Tomorrow will be another day for me to post on the past 2 days

right now my mind is too tired and i do know u bloggers are waiting!! sleep tight and my dad said jane would say "see ya" adios moe weird i dreamt of her twice today-one dream i couldn't find her in a group of people and it was so frustrating and the other was better-I was talking to dad and we heard her talking as a third party on the phone-it was so weird-on a power nap this afternoon-jane loved the power naps!

IN MEMORY OF JANE,IN HONOR OF BARRY!!

Good Morning.I just got done reading the blog. Wow! I cried and cried. I have a favor to ask of you. Could you post the following on the blog since I don't know how? A few of us thought this would be wonderful.Relay for Life Memorial Walk - Saturday, April 4 at 11:00 am - Wesminster CollegeWe all know that Jane was so excited that Tim would be able to walk again this year after missing last year. Unfortunately, he will be in New England for the Memorial Service. Anyone who would like to join together in a few laps in memory of Jane, please join us this Saturday. 11:00 is when the memorial service will be going on in New England. We thought this would be our support for Barry and Tim from back home.Thanks. from lisa pearson one of jane's many friends!!!

MEMORIES OF JANE TO BE SHARED TODAY!!

Please join Jane Kaminske's family and friends today at The Smith Funeral Home,310 West Neshannock Ave, New Wilmington, Pa. from 2-4 and 7 to 9pm. A funeral service will be held Tuesday at 9am at the New Wilmington Presbyterian Church,South Market Street,New Wilmington. On these days may u also perform a random act of kindness for someone as I promised her I would request and pass the word of this blogsite on. Jane would I am sure allow HUGS AND TEARS at this gathering/passing phase of her life. Thanks to all adios moe the boss as she always called me!! Your concerns will help especially Barry and Tim. Please no flowers. You can donate to the Cancer Society in her name or Susan Komen for the Cause

"i feel like i lost a job"

My job now is to pass the blog word on and today I sent an email to work for a posting for all to read in regards to a promise to Jane we had made. I specifically asked for my work friends to read some comments as they would understand how much my sister Jane meant to me and her family and large circle of friends. I find myself today still trying to believe she is gone-after all I have seen so many pass in my nursing career. Today was like I lost my job-my sister didn't tell me what the day was like-that I needed to post for her.For the past 4 plus years I have been going hand in hand with her on the cancer journey like so many other family and new and old friends starting with the first relay walk when she had just had chemo and was as bald as a cucumber but she held her head ever so high that day and everyday until her last breath on this earth. She once told me that u get it if u have been through cancer-u appreciate every second in time-u never have a harsh word for anybody. I also promised her that I would make sure people are reminded that random acts of kindness go a long way. Another promise was that I would be there for Tim and Barry for Tim's High School graduation in June and the party also. Well thanks to all for your heartfealt soul searching. I think we should put all the tears together and this summer there won't be a water shortage. Of course right now the Kleenex factory is empty. And yes Jane some laughter of past memories will get us thru this journey in memory of u this week. adios the whole family clan who loves u all

Jane..You are my angel now.....

All my love is in heaven with you now. I know you will be the brightest star in heaven watching over all of us. I love you with my whole heart........Eileen

JANE YOU ARE NOW WITH YOUR AWESOME GOD!!

With tears streaming down my face I write this blog entry. This morning around 10 am Jane passed with Barry,Tim, and her dad at her bedside. When I spoke to her yesterday had wanted to ask her how to present this time on her precious blog, but her physical strength was limited yesterday. This is a short poem from Brenda/Doug/Steph that was given to them at some time and it goes as follows:

JANE

God saw you getting tired
and a cure was not to be
so he put his arms around you
and whispered "come to me".
With tearful eyes we watched you
and saw you pass away.
Although we loved you dearly
we could not make you stay.

She left us quietly
her thoughts unknown
But she left us memories,
We're proud to own.
So treasure her Lord,
In your garden of rest,
For here on earth, she was the best.


Cape Cod will be ever more special to us::: We'll see you there!! We love you-

Thank you Barry for caring for our daughter,sister,mother,friend etc. Tim what a beautiful son you are and she loved your quartet singing yesterday. And dad how fortunate you were to spend the last few days with Jane your youngest daughter. As we always have said when someone dies--They now know the mystery!!. adios moe

A GREAT BIG THANK U FROM JANE'S DAD FOR HER!!

would u please post a Thank You Thank You to the School Administration, all included, who ever arranged for the MUSIC MAN QUARTET TO VISIT JANE JUST NOW .The four young men included Tim Kaminske, Tony Gregory, James Gregory, and John Allegro As in the production, they sang without piano or orchestra four of the songs from the production. Jane was able to sit up and enjoy the presentation.As for Barry and I we have to compliment the seventy performers and everyone for a GREAT evenings entertainment. Jane's dad-doug

JANE'S SENSE OF HUMOR PRICELESS!!

Well this am I was able to talk briefly with Jane as she is exhausted. Had talked to dad first and then to her. At the end of her conversation, had told her to hand the phone back to dad and with her honest sense of humor she says"as Johnny Carson used to say here's daddy". Busy at the house today with the delivery of the bed. At this time Patti with Jane as Tim is cranking out the tunes at the High School Musical of The Music Man with Barry and Dad watching him. I told Patti to tell Jane that there are 28 entries today of what the blog means to each person. I could hear her say WOW in the background. Jane settled downstairs and is watching Tv. Patty heading to eat some of those scallops. Hopefully tomorrow Jane will be able to hear the blog entries. Tonight is not the time. Well keep on posting and that's all for tonight folks!! thanks and love u all adios moe

Have a favor please for all Jane's bloggin buddies!!

Today was a busy day at the Kaminske's. A visit by the Hospice nurse this pm assured that Jane is comfortable as she had requested to be. Just spoke to Dad who said that off and on today Jane was alert,but basically bedbound all day with limited awake periods. He said tomorrow he would try and have Jane listen to the blog entries as he reads them. I would like u all to post what Jane's blog MEANS to each of u and how it has touched each of your lives!!Also a prayer wave for comfort for Jane and also strength for Jane,dad,Barry, and Tim. Thanks and adios moe

"A SPECIAL MOMENT IN TIME"

A SPECIAL UPS delivery today to the Kaminskes!!And what would that be? a various edible mollusks with 2 curved,deeply grooved, hinged shells also known as a scallop-we used to open them in the cellar when we lived on Nantucket! and also several large lively edible sea crustaceans with four pairs of legs and a pair of pincers-lobsters!! And things do come in threes they say!! And a male parent-jane's dad!! Life is good at this time and as Jane would say what more could we ask for? And we all know who will eat every body of those lobsters-dad always does!! I am so impressed at the number of blog postings!! adios for now and thanks to all" moe the boss on vacation as dad is the real boss-hope he left the briefcase home Jane!! p.s. it is nice to have someone in the family that knows where to get fresh fish-little brother doug-brenda,and steph!!

The bottom line is-------------------

It is what it is! I once heard these words within the past years and they have stuck in my brain since that day. Don't ask me why.

My fathers comes for his visit tomrorow. Am so looking forward to that. And then my brother comes the following Sunday, they return home together

Hospice jere tomorrow.

Typed by self. long process.

It's Jane....

I am very greatful for all of your concern but am finding it very difficult to type and concentrate
Doesn't seem worth it. Lets try this out. If you need to contact me, just leave you're comment here and I will get back to you as soon as I can. This will save my energy and allow me to rest a bit more.

Jane (with Tim typing)

Moe's update for our awesome Jane!!

Jane did call me friday night after she had gotten up and Patti actually had spent some time with her. She was more comfortable and able to walk about in the kitchen etc. Told her I would catch up with her saturday when I got to the Cape. Hopped on dad's computer and noticed no blog entry -we all look for it-a sign she might be feeling a little better!! So last night after 815p I called Barry and he said Jane was in bed all day-when she woke up had no idea what day it was,where she was etc. The pain was better but continues with the abdominal pain and Amy the hospice nurse was heading over then to increase the morphine drip so she would be more comfortable. At 730this am she had told me to call her cell phone as she hears it beep and knows there has been a call-left a message and right away she mentioned she felt better, tim and barry were at church. I told her everyone looks for her to post on the blog and she said she might try. I find it sad when I see no posting. When I was at Jane's I had told her I would get together some pics for a collage. Well last night while mom with her dementia is sitting on her bed, i am going thru tons of old pictures of our familly-jane on nantucket holding dougie as an infant, jane, barry and tim in the hospital when he was born etc-u know the rest-tons of memories-the tears are streaming down my face and mom asks"are u crying moe and i say yes and tell her jane is sick and that is it in her dementia world. We all say that it is nice she won't remember this ./Catch up with her with a cell phone hello even if she doesn't return call. I hope she is more comforatble tonight. Me and Eileen tried to put tims pic on blog but could not get it to work!! Rest up Kaminskes as the real boss DAD comes tuesday pm. thanks to all and adios moe

Jane is more comfortable today!!

I talked to Barry this afternoon and he mentioned that Jane is on the constant morphine drip with the as needed push button for more pain med if needed. Jane had been out of be a couple times today-was able to go up and down the stairs by self. Barry was planning to make Jane some shrimp for supper. Hopefully Jane will be able to post later. She will call me later as she had gone upstairs for a nap-is using the ativan for relaxation too. Well what can I say but the usual adios moe thank u hospice

"please pain go away!"

After phone tag with Jane she called me at 935pm. Was in bed all day with nasty pain-had just gotten up. Waiting for the hospice nurse to come within the hour with probably the morphine pain medicine pump for her portacath iv route. Please just pray for the pump route to lessen her pain. Did mention receiving some Relay for Life cancer donations in the mail. Thanks to Barry and Tim for being with Jane and her friends too. Off to work I go and will catch up wilth her this afternoon. Adios moe

Bye Eileen

This a.m. I woke up with a different part of my body in pain. Abdominal much better, but back shoulder area hurts a lot. Called Amy after I took my usual meds for the day. Let the pills do their thing and there was no imrprovement. Once again she tweaked my meds, am wondering if this is just the way it's going to be. In bed most of the day.

Yes, Eileen left on time. I did't cry cause that woud cause more pain. Thanks!

My typing is very slow. Am making lots of errors and fixing them before I send them. Slow process.

Next family to come is Dad and brother Doug, separate times. Looking forward to an actual hug.

Eileen heads home Wednesday. Thanks

I haven't felt good since I woke up yesterday a.m. Am sore in the intestinal area. Amy, my hospice nurse, has adjusted my medication a bit. Probably has something to do with medication I'm on. This week I've noticed that just climbing to the 3rd floor takes the wind out of me. So she suggested that I need someone to follow me up the stairs holding my portable oxygen. And yes, if need be take one stair at a time. On the personal side, I've had bowels moved along with gas, which I've been told are good things. Have to put the blame somewhere, so will put it on medication.

As you may have already received we're approaching another Relay for Life. I'm atttempting to clean up my address book so I apologize if you get the email twice. Hit me with a wet noodle!

Eileen heads home tomorrow p.m. Will certainly miss her. She's been a great help around here. Along with being Mrs. Clean she's been a special friend when I most needed one. At times silence was just what I needed! And I wholeheartedly appreciated every minute she was here.
Thanks!

PS. Welcome home, Rick F. Am sure just being in your own home will work wonders. No place like home. Can't wait to see you.

PSS. I may not always say it, but Thanks to everyone.

Happy Birthday, Pretty Patti

Need I say anything more....

Born on St. Patty's day.................

Not feeling great today

I woke up this morning not feeling too good. I called my Hospice nurse Amy and she was here in a flash. I had stomach cramps and the pain level was up there again. They are changing my meds around again, so I hope they work. We went out to dinner tonight for Pretty Patti's birthday tomorrow.

Relay for Life 4/4/09

Yes, it's that time again. Last year Tim did not participate in the Relay for Life but this is his last year in High School and he's looking forward to it. It's on April 4, 2009 at Westminster College where I used to work up until last year. Numerous health issues have entered my life since I last wrote a group email. I continue to blog my life which is an open book. The website is listed above. To sum it up: I've had chest resection 11/07, 2 bleeding brain tumors 4/08 and 12/08, and pleuresy of the lungs (cancer) (surgery involved) most recently. I've lost track where the cancer has gone. I have most recently decided to stop treatment and join hospice. Maintain quality of life rather than quantity of life. A decision I don't regret. My latest chemo treatment this month really hit me like a stick. That was it. Barry's cancer continues to stay put, no change in over a year. He's my angel, does all the cooking/grocery shopping and housekeeping. I went on disability last November after working full time through all this Tim continues to be my strength. Excels in his school work. Has been accepted at Penn State/Erie in the fall. Is the 10 with class rank last I knew. Smart kid. I do believe that is how he accepts this crazy life we have placed him in. So, if you wish to make a donation and know my address just mail the ck payable to American Cancer SocietyRelay for Life to me. Otherwise, leave comment and will email the address to you. Again, thanks for all your support.

Another week is done

Yeah. My father's coming to visit along with my brother. They are traveling separately the end of the month due to my brother's work schedule. Plus my dad will be able to see Tim perform in Music Man which is an added treat. Can't wait.

Never left the house today.

Hospice is down to once a week for visits since pain is under somewhat control.

Eileen continues to be a great help with laundry, etc. Never complains, seems to always like to clean. Must be sick.!

Tim had no school today but he was at musical practice all day.

Every day I do some filing. Almost able to see desktop.

Pain level remains at 2-3.

Thanks for continued prayers and thoughts.

TimBa, Myself and Barry on one of our many bike trips. This one was to Killington, VT. Always had a good time! Nice memories will never fade.

What is hospice?

The Hospice Concept
Hospice is a concept of caring derived from medieval times, symbolizing a place where travelers, pilgrims and the sick, wounded or dying could find rest and comfort. The contemporary hospice offers a comprehensive program of care to patients and families facing a life threatening illness. Hospice is primarily a concept of care, not a specific place of care.
Hospice emphasizes palliative rather than curative treatment; quality rather than quantity of life. The dying are comforted. Professional medical care is given, and sophisticated symptom relief provided. The patient and family are both included in the care plan and emotional, spiritual and practical support is given based on the patient’s wishes and family’s needs. Trained volunteers can offer respite care for family members as well as meaningful support to the patient.
Hospice affirms life and regards dying as a normal process. Hospice neither hastens nor postpones death. Hospice provides personalized services and a caring community so that patients and families can attain the necessary preparation for a death that is satisfactory to them.
Those involved in the process of dying have a variety of physical, spiritual, emotional and social needs. The nature of dying is so unique that the goal of the hospice team is to be sensitive and responsive to the special requirements of each individual and family.
Hospice care is provided to patients who have a limited life expectancy. Although most hospice patients are cancer patients, hospices accept anyone regardless of age or type of illness. These patients have also made a decision to spend their last months at home or in a homelike setting.



_______________

From the internet.

Maureen goes home today..

Maureen left this a.m. to go home. Eileen is staying until next Wednesday to keep me company.
Thanks to Roger he's doing fine these past days. He has beginning signs of alzheimers but is still able to watch out for himself with guidance. They have a system of calling each other at same time each day just to make sure he is OK. And it seems to be working perfectly.

And I must admit that I did not shed many tears when Maureen left with Barry and Eileen for airport. I think that is due to doing what I wanted to do in the amount of time I had. With no regrets.

Have found about 3 notes left behind by my sister. She likes to hide them, and then I have fun trying to find them. Keeps me on the alert!

Linda F.-Saw pix of your hubby's birthday celebration at Rehab. Center. Glad you were able to at least be human for some time. Looking forward to seeing/meeting him when he gets out of rehab. cause I feel that I already know him.

What more can I say?

This morning my hospice RN Amy stopped by. We are now on a weekly schedule but if needed she's a phone call away. While I was suffering all those months, she made me feel comfortable by just spending time with me and going through my meds to find the perfect recipe. Compared to my previous pain levels of 10, having a level of 2-3 presently is wonderful. And I think that pain is a result of my chest plate. Again, no complaints.

Well, my sister Maureen is leaving in the morning to go home. As my pictures said, having her make original toll house cookies was on the top of my list. And boy were they good. My intention is to freeze some (yeah..) for a rainy day. Have you ever eaten one frozen? Even better that way. Eileen will leave in a couple of days.

It's been a great time visiting with everyone. I can honestly say that I've done everything I wanted to do. (exception: no Cooke's fresh fried shrimp.) Perhaps I can put that in my bucket list. One more trip to the Cape for fried shrimp. A girl can dream, can't she? Another word to use would be FORWARD.


PS Happy Birthday, Rick F.! Hope to see you at the Music Man.

During every visit my vitals are checked. This is being done by Amy. (and no, my leg is not amputated!)

Top photo is Lisa, hospice social worker who visits me monthly. Then I took Maureen to see Joe Ann at the College.

Jody and Ann L. stopped by for a visit. You know, you can't beat friends and family! Then we went to lunch.

I'm downloading pix to my blog, the 3 musketeers with St. Patty's ties, and "would you please scratch my head.!"

My only request of Maureen was to have home made toll house cookies, and she pulled through for me. Thanks.

Today we celebrated our 29th Anniversary.

This morning I took my sisters to church, and Tim went with Barry. As usual, during the whole service I felt at peace. Nice and calm, relaxed. I try to find something each day that sticks to my soul and I found it during today's sermon.

This is just a brief part of the sermon:

"When we stand firm in God's grace, our hands are free to love others...instead of grasping to things in fear."

How true.

PS. Thanks Calvin for the delicious cupcakes and for your friendship.

PSS. Happy early Birthday Rick F. Am looking forward to seeing you when you get out of rehab. Mark your calendar for the end of March. Music Man is coming to town and I want to see you there.

PSSS. Thanks for allowing me to enjoy yet one more special day.

Happy 29th Anniversary, Barry. Not as good as Cape Cod, but still good.

Calvin was my secret Valentine. And I could ask him to do something special for me, and of course I chose "make cupcakes." And they were so tasty.

Once again, family is the best medicine.

This was taken today after church, with my sisters and Rev. Hawkins. Will write later about his sermon.

We went out Red Lobster for our anniversary, and we left these behind!

I miss seeing the deer. Eileen, Tim and myself climbing basement stairs. Hey Moe, do you want a ride on my bike! I'll be careful.

Thanks to Ensure and to ice cream, I'm slowly regaining the lost lbs.

I have never seen so many greeting cards in my life. And I appreciate each and everyone of them.

We all hate to shop, but just had to get out of the house. Had to bring my watch to jewelry store to be fixed. Had been broken for over 2 years.

Pretty Patti, Me. Eileen and Maureen. I've never seen Patti look bad. Patti and the 3 musketeers.

Maureen has arrived. After the plane came in they had to make a trip to Costco.

Prayer blanket made for me by Hospice, Pam. Thanks.