After getting to the hospital at 2:3o ish (left work at 1 p.m.), I had a chest x-ray which is a nothing procedure that lasts just a couple of minutes. Then I headed up to see my surgeon Dr. C. Got there at about 3:20 p.m. Didn't see him until 6:30 p.m.!! How's that for a long wait. And then the consultation only lasted say about 15 mins. I was his last patient. After working 5 hrs. and going through the long afternoon at hospital, I was mentally exhausted. I have to apologize to my sister for cutting her short when she called me on my way home. Since I was gone for such a long time, my medication schedule was off and I was also feeling discomfort.
Looks like it will be chemotime for me again. I was sent to Dr. C. to see if he was going to be on same page as my oncologist. The page being just do the chemo, don't worry about biopsy of lungs. There's always a risk when dealing with lungs, and considering that the breast cancer has invaded elsewhere recently it's pretty much has invaded the lungs. And I agreed with him.
He'll update Dr. B. at Magee, and then I'll have concur with Dr. S who is my local intown oncologist. Lots of doctors involved, just because I go for second opinions now. My life is too important.
Saturday, March 29, 2008
Friday, March 28, 2008
Possible plan of attack.....
I meet with surgeon this p.m. in the city, after I have chest x-ray. Then I should have some kind of plan of attack with the cancer...
Wednesday, March 26, 2008
Back to Pittsburgh Friday for consult with surgeon
I'm off to work. Even wearing a new skirt and top I got at WalMart. Showing my legs today. Even though I was up a lot during the night, it wasn't due to the pain. Just couldn't sleep. The muscle relaxer seems to be working. Will take one before I leave for work, along with my other meds. It's amazing how much better you feel mentally when you don't have the physical pain. Am thankful today.
Got phone call this afternoon stating that I'm heading back to Pittsburgh for a chest x-ray and then for a consultation with my surgeon Dr. Christie. He's been my surgeon for the past hospital stays, including the main operation in Nov. 2007.
He will be going over my options and explaining all that showed up in CT/PET scan. I'm very glad that I'll be speaking to him, because he is the one person that knows what has been happening within my body the past few months. Has seen first hand how fast the cancer is roaming about within me.
Just give me a plan and I'll be on my way (again!)
Got phone call this afternoon stating that I'm heading back to Pittsburgh for a chest x-ray and then for a consultation with my surgeon Dr. Christie. He's been my surgeon for the past hospital stays, including the main operation in Nov. 2007.
He will be going over my options and explaining all that showed up in CT/PET scan. I'm very glad that I'll be speaking to him, because he is the one person that knows what has been happening within my body the past few months. Has seen first hand how fast the cancer is roaming about within me.
Just give me a plan and I'll be on my way (again!)
Tuesday, March 25, 2008
Results are in...Schedule lung biopsy next
I woke up this a.m. and eventually threw up. But assuming that my co-worker would also not be in today, I figured I needed to get to work anyway. My shoulder/collar bone area was in the worse pain of all today, as I drove to work. Was especially hard just to put the car into drive and then park. But I knew as soon as I got there, going was a mistake. My boss asked how I was doing and all the tears that were building up came out. I immediately shut down computer and went home. Then I called my doctor's office to set up appointment. I was only able to see the doctor in training, but that was fine as I needed someone to check me out.
Have been put on muscle relaxant, in addition to taking the pain meds I've been taking. My back was so tense and the area in question was so sore. Have also been scheduled to take some physical therapy, as the worst thing would be that the muscles/arms would stop being used 'cause of pain. Important that this not happen.
As for the nausea, caused by the severe pain. Continue to take nausea pills.
Went right to drug store to fill the script, and then right home to get into pj's.
I heard from the Director at Magee hospital in the afternoon about 2 ish. He was calling with the results of the PET/CT scans. There is a lymph node that is showing up probably as cancer, but his concern right now is to biopsy an area on my lung that has an area that measures about the size of a fingernail. Not the news I wanted to hear, since previously they were too small to even measure. So he is contacting my previous surgeon to have this biopsy scheduled. I'm not sure why a biopsy is needed considering my past cancer history, but have to understand that you can't really get any higher an opinion that this doctor in question.
So that's it for now. The relaxant pill seems to be helping. I'm just at the awkward stage of not wanting to move the shoulder too much, afraid that the pain is still there. And considering that it's been 8 hrs. since I took the first pill, it's now time for another.
Have been put on muscle relaxant, in addition to taking the pain meds I've been taking. My back was so tense and the area in question was so sore. Have also been scheduled to take some physical therapy, as the worst thing would be that the muscles/arms would stop being used 'cause of pain. Important that this not happen.
As for the nausea, caused by the severe pain. Continue to take nausea pills.
Went right to drug store to fill the script, and then right home to get into pj's.
I heard from the Director at Magee hospital in the afternoon about 2 ish. He was calling with the results of the PET/CT scans. There is a lymph node that is showing up probably as cancer, but his concern right now is to biopsy an area on my lung that has an area that measures about the size of a fingernail. Not the news I wanted to hear, since previously they were too small to even measure. So he is contacting my previous surgeon to have this biopsy scheduled. I'm not sure why a biopsy is needed considering my past cancer history, but have to understand that you can't really get any higher an opinion that this doctor in question.
So that's it for now. The relaxant pill seems to be helping. I'm just at the awkward stage of not wanting to move the shoulder too much, afraid that the pain is still there. And considering that it's been 8 hrs. since I took the first pill, it's now time for another.
Friday, March 21, 2008
PET/CT Scans done! yeah....
One last thing done on my "to do" list. Now heading to bed for some rest...
Tim was great today. While I did tests, he walked about 2 miles to Univ. of Pittsburgh campus to see his friend Luke. Even had some good pizza for lunch in the city. Never realized he knew how to get around the city.... Smart kid.
PS. Lisa, he loved seeing Luke again and this time having a chance to see his dorm.
Really enjoyed it.
Tim was great today. While I did tests, he walked about 2 miles to Univ. of Pittsburgh campus to see his friend Luke. Even had some good pizza for lunch in the city. Never realized he knew how to get around the city.... Smart kid.
PS. Lisa, he loved seeing Luke again and this time having a chance to see his dorm.
Really enjoyed it.
Thursday, March 20, 2008
CT/PET scans tomorrow
Am going through with CT/PET scans tomorrow at Hillman as planned. Have talked to a nurse there and she has said that drinking one type of the contrast may not have to be done, I'll see how I am when I get there. Tim's going with me for moral support, plus as a driver if I should not feel good. Been a tough couple of weeks for me. I did speak to dr.'s office today and have been told what I've been feeling is shingles and medicine related due to shingles. Just needs to run its course. My immediate goal right now is to get these tests completed, so questions can be answered. All going back to CT scan from mid January that showed the recurrence of breast cancer, and some questionable spots on my lungs.
Let's hope it's a Good Friday.
Let's hope it's a Good Friday.
Wednesday, March 19, 2008
I just don't feel good
I went to work Monday for first time since being sick with shingles for the week. Think that was a bit too soon. Ended up going right to bed when I got home from work. Later that evening I felt a bit nauseous. When I woke up Tuesday I could feel that this was not a day to work, no energy at all. I would go under the covers and have slight chills. No fever though. I stayed in bed almost all day. Was up just to watch American Idol and Dancing with the Stars.
This a.m. I did go to work. But as I was leaving for lunch, I barely made it to the car before I threw up a bit. Got home and immediately just called work to say I'd be staying home. Again, stayed in bed most of the day. Just can't pinpoint exactly what's wrong. I do know that last week the dr. had me taking the pain meds just to get through the pain of the shingles.
One thing that's been wrong with me since I began radiation a couple of weeks ago is my right rear shoulder. Hurts all the time when I attempt to lay on my back. Never had hurt that spot before. And it hurts even when I'm not in bed as much as these past few days. Do think I'm going to contact the surgeon in Pittsburgh for his opinion on this, along with the ongoing pain of my chest plate. Not comfortable at all, these 2 issues.
I think also I have a lot on my plate lately. 2 1/2 weeks of radiation, working fulltime while going through that and then coming down with shingles. And perhaps thinking I could bounce back from having shingles by just being out for 5 days. Don't know, but I'm tired of not feeling my usual self-whatever that was.
Had rescheduled PET/CT scan for this Friday but am going to cancel it. Don't think I would be able to consume all that contrast with the past few days of yucky stomach.
This a.m. I did go to work. But as I was leaving for lunch, I barely made it to the car before I threw up a bit. Got home and immediately just called work to say I'd be staying home. Again, stayed in bed most of the day. Just can't pinpoint exactly what's wrong. I do know that last week the dr. had me taking the pain meds just to get through the pain of the shingles.
One thing that's been wrong with me since I began radiation a couple of weeks ago is my right rear shoulder. Hurts all the time when I attempt to lay on my back. Never had hurt that spot before. And it hurts even when I'm not in bed as much as these past few days. Do think I'm going to contact the surgeon in Pittsburgh for his opinion on this, along with the ongoing pain of my chest plate. Not comfortable at all, these 2 issues.
I think also I have a lot on my plate lately. 2 1/2 weeks of radiation, working fulltime while going through that and then coming down with shingles. And perhaps thinking I could bounce back from having shingles by just being out for 5 days. Don't know, but I'm tired of not feeling my usual self-whatever that was.
Had rescheduled PET/CT scan for this Friday but am going to cancel it. Don't think I would be able to consume all that contrast with the past few days of yucky stomach.
Monday, March 17, 2008
Please send prayers to Barb and to her family
Back in July '06, Jody contacted me about a friend of hers whose husband Gary was dealing with cancer. After a valiant fight (yes, he truly fought to the end) he died this a.m. in her arms. They had tried so many treatments, from non-traditional to even chemoembolization that Barry goes through. He seemed to always be in pain. And most recently I wrote her just to say that what he was going through was not living at all. She knew this was the case. She is a mother to triplet teenagers, so has definitely been through hell and back.
Here's a part of her first email she ever sent me in July '06: I know she won't mind:
==================================
Hi Jane,Thank you so much for writing and the information. I am having a very hard time with all of this and am frustrated with the slow process. I know, now that the Drs. say the cancer in my husband, Gary is slow growing and at this stage it is inoperable and incurable which means they plan to just make him comfortable. I am so angry at the medical world right now as we arrived on time to his appointment yesterday with the oncologist fully prepared for him to set up a date to begin the Chemoemboliztion and he made us wait an hour and a half to tell us that they won't be doing that for awhile. He will give him a hormone shot once a month which has supposedly had some slight results in shrinking tumors. Then if that hasn't worked after possibly six months to a year, then they will do the more invasive chemoembolization. I just started to cry and feel so frustrated that they aren't trying to remove the tumors and aren't being more aggressive. I am telling people that I feel like Shirley McClaine and Debra Winger in Terms of Endearment with Mom screaming at the hospital staff that her daughter needs pain meds now............and no one is listening. It is so frustrating to me that they have basically no interest in trying things to help him, just ways to make him comfortable????????? Oh sure, there are new drugs coming out everyday and they are hopeful a new one will come out within the next year, but what about all of this cancer that is in him now??????? This doctor who is Indian and did not speak very good English, tried to explain that the cells that Gary has have not had success in being treated by Chemo and they will use that only when Gary shows signs of liver failure. He is on a vitamin supplement program that is aimed at stopping tumor growth and has changed his diet to all organic and mostly veggies and fruits. No sugar or white flour whatsoever. He is meeting with a nutritionist/MD next week.The actual tumor in the pancreas is only 1.5cm x 1.3 but it is an aggressive little bugger and has spread numerously into his liver and surrounding lymph nodes. They show no concern over this and won't operate to remove the tumor because it has mestastized.It looks like we will eventually begin the embolization and your information was very helpful. We too have 15 year olds so I understand how difficult it is to be away from them so much despite them being so independent! It is encouraging to hear your spirit and fight against your different cancers and I appreciate your thoughts and words of wisdom during ours. Thank YOU for writing and I hope we are able to continue to share our war stories.Thank you!
=======================================================================
PS. Parts were edited out of privacy for her.
Now Gary can rest without the unbearable aches and pains. God bless you Barb and family.
Here's a part of her first email she ever sent me in July '06: I know she won't mind:
==================================
Hi Jane,Thank you so much for writing and the information. I am having a very hard time with all of this and am frustrated with the slow process. I know, now that the Drs. say the cancer in my husband, Gary is slow growing and at this stage it is inoperable and incurable which means they plan to just make him comfortable. I am so angry at the medical world right now as we arrived on time to his appointment yesterday with the oncologist fully prepared for him to set up a date to begin the Chemoemboliztion and he made us wait an hour and a half to tell us that they won't be doing that for awhile. He will give him a hormone shot once a month which has supposedly had some slight results in shrinking tumors. Then if that hasn't worked after possibly six months to a year, then they will do the more invasive chemoembolization. I just started to cry and feel so frustrated that they aren't trying to remove the tumors and aren't being more aggressive. I am telling people that I feel like Shirley McClaine and Debra Winger in Terms of Endearment with Mom screaming at the hospital staff that her daughter needs pain meds now............and no one is listening. It is so frustrating to me that they have basically no interest in trying things to help him, just ways to make him comfortable????????? Oh sure, there are new drugs coming out everyday and they are hopeful a new one will come out within the next year, but what about all of this cancer that is in him now??????? This doctor who is Indian and did not speak very good English, tried to explain that the cells that Gary has have not had success in being treated by Chemo and they will use that only when Gary shows signs of liver failure. He is on a vitamin supplement program that is aimed at stopping tumor growth and has changed his diet to all organic and mostly veggies and fruits. No sugar or white flour whatsoever. He is meeting with a nutritionist/MD next week.The actual tumor in the pancreas is only 1.5cm x 1.3 but it is an aggressive little bugger and has spread numerously into his liver and surrounding lymph nodes. They show no concern over this and won't operate to remove the tumor because it has mestastized.It looks like we will eventually begin the embolization and your information was very helpful. We too have 15 year olds so I understand how difficult it is to be away from them so much despite them being so independent! It is encouraging to hear your spirit and fight against your different cancers and I appreciate your thoughts and words of wisdom during ours. Thank YOU for writing and I hope we are able to continue to share our war stories.Thank you!
=======================================================================
PS. Parts were edited out of privacy for her.
Now Gary can rest without the unbearable aches and pains. God bless you Barb and family.
Saturday, March 15, 2008
Yes, Jody. It's been 3 years....
I can't believe that Jody remembered my cancer'sary date today. It was 3 years ago that I first heard the words "you've got cancer." I wish I could say I was in remission but can't, at least for now. Having this blog has helped me so much. Has helped me to see where I've been and what I've been through, plus the ability to read so many inspirational comments that friends have posted. Angels do walk among us.
Sleep
One thing I've been doing this week is sleeping. Can't seem to get enough of it.
Well, I was told to relax and sure am doing that. I don't think I would be sleeping if my body wasn't in need of it.
Today Tim has a matinee show and the last evening show for Damn Yankees. He's been enjoying it, but you can see signs of a kid getting a bit overtired. Am glad it's the last day for him.
Well, I was told to relax and sure am doing that. I don't think I would be sleeping if my body wasn't in need of it.
Today Tim has a matinee show and the last evening show for Damn Yankees. He's been enjoying it, but you can see signs of a kid getting a bit overtired. Am glad it's the last day for him.
Friday, March 14, 2008
Barry enjoys the show...
Barry was able to see Tim and his friends perform in Damn Yankees tonight. It actually worked out good that I stayed home. Do you want to know why? 'Cause Barry got to enjoy an empty seat next to him! See, I can always come up with something positive.. He really enjoyed the show and all the hard work that the kids did to put on this production. Not sure who he was talking about, but the 2 twisted sisters impressed him a lot in their acting. Will have to ask Tim who they were. For once it was a mainly boys musical which was a switch for a change. It taught the boys singing and dancing. I'll be able to enjoy it on DVD once it's made.
And yes, Barry saw so many of our friends there. A nice community for sure.
And yes, Barry saw so many of our friends there. A nice community for sure.
Thursday, March 13, 2008
Opening Night for Damn Yankees
Never thought I'd be sitting home and not able to see Tim perform in Damn Yankees. Sure I'll be able to see it on DVD but it's just not the same as seeing it in person.
But there was no way I could go with knowing I have shingles. I actually did think about renting a bubble so I could go, but just couldn't find a bubble to rent in this town. Even thought of sneeking up into the balcony to see the show, but there is no balcony at his school.
In the whole scheme of things I do realize it's just a musical, but you know- it is just that- a musical that Tim practiced for the past 2 months. As Tim said to me, next year he'll be in another musical and perhaps have an even bigger part. He always seems to know what to say.
As for the shingles, I have not seen any blistering which I had anticipated seeing. Continues to be itchy and a bit less sore. I've made a dr.'s appointment for Monday morning for it to be checked out. Have been told to go in through the back door to avoid the potential of getting someone sick.
But there was no way I could go with knowing I have shingles. I actually did think about renting a bubble so I could go, but just couldn't find a bubble to rent in this town. Even thought of sneeking up into the balcony to see the show, but there is no balcony at his school.
In the whole scheme of things I do realize it's just a musical, but you know- it is just that- a musical that Tim practiced for the past 2 months. As Tim said to me, next year he'll be in another musical and perhaps have an even bigger part. He always seems to know what to say.
As for the shingles, I have not seen any blistering which I had anticipated seeing. Continues to be itchy and a bit less sore. I've made a dr.'s appointment for Monday morning for it to be checked out. Have been told to go in through the back door to avoid the potential of getting someone sick.
Tuesday, March 11, 2008
Shingles suck
Just when you think the pain can't get worse, it does. I want to jump out of my skin the pain and itchiness is so bad. Pain meds, shingle meds, benadryl, hydrocortisone cream, cold compress of water and vinegar and oatmeal baths don't see to help. Geez, is there a reason why I'm getting kicked while already down? Again, shingles suck.
Monday, March 10, 2008
Just diagnosed with shingles (and they hurt!)
Will explain more later but now I know why I've been exhausted, and body hurting more than the "norm." On meds now, and told to take more pain pills. Contagious for about 5 days or so. No work for me this week. Therefore, I can't even see Tim in musical this week. That's the most upsetting to me right now.
Off to bed as sleep was not in my vocabulary past couple of nights.
CT/PET scans canceled for tomorrow due to this.
Update:
In looking back I was so exhausted last week. Began on about Wednesday. Didn't sleep well this weekend. Sometime during Saturday I noticed a couple of red marks on my left shoulder. Showed Barry them. They were sore to touch. Didn't do much the rest of the day.
Turned clocks ahead Saturday night. Still wasn't feeling good. Not getting good sleep at all. Body more sore than normal. Didn't even make it to church on Sunday, that was unusual. Was scheduled to have picture taken for being eucharistic minister. A bad night for sleeping. Just tossed and turned. Didn't accomplish anything on Sunday. Continued to feel sore.
Last night was another restless night. Went to bed with 3 different type pillows, trying to get comfortable. Left shoulder and back were very sore. No position felt good. Noticed that when I touched the area of the red marks and area on my back, that both areas were still sore. I knew I was seeing radiation/oncologist today so felt good about that. Today was my last scheduled radiation treatment. Took camera with me again. When I got there, the receptionist handed me a shamrock good luck plant that Cookie had bought for me. She's my friend who I met who is being treated for vocal chord cancer. She had heard my appt. was moved to 8 a.m. today and wanted to give me a gift. She left the nicest note on the plant for me. (Did call her tonight to fill her in and to thank her.)
As soon as doctor saw me he said it appeared to be shingles. In just a short time the spots had changed dramatically. I had not seen that they had multiplied. Mostly on my shoulder/chest/neck area. Also sent me to see primary dr. and I was given meds for the shingles.
As I type the shingles are very very sore. Very very itchy. Have taken benadryl and even that doesn't help the itch. The pain goes deep under my skin.
That's it for now cause I'm not feeling good. Can't wait to see what tonight brings me! Not fun at all.
Off to bed as sleep was not in my vocabulary past couple of nights.
CT/PET scans canceled for tomorrow due to this.
Update:
In looking back I was so exhausted last week. Began on about Wednesday. Didn't sleep well this weekend. Sometime during Saturday I noticed a couple of red marks on my left shoulder. Showed Barry them. They were sore to touch. Didn't do much the rest of the day.
Turned clocks ahead Saturday night. Still wasn't feeling good. Not getting good sleep at all. Body more sore than normal. Didn't even make it to church on Sunday, that was unusual. Was scheduled to have picture taken for being eucharistic minister. A bad night for sleeping. Just tossed and turned. Didn't accomplish anything on Sunday. Continued to feel sore.
Last night was another restless night. Went to bed with 3 different type pillows, trying to get comfortable. Left shoulder and back were very sore. No position felt good. Noticed that when I touched the area of the red marks and area on my back, that both areas were still sore. I knew I was seeing radiation/oncologist today so felt good about that. Today was my last scheduled radiation treatment. Took camera with me again. When I got there, the receptionist handed me a shamrock good luck plant that Cookie had bought for me. She's my friend who I met who is being treated for vocal chord cancer. She had heard my appt. was moved to 8 a.m. today and wanted to give me a gift. She left the nicest note on the plant for me. (Did call her tonight to fill her in and to thank her.)
As soon as doctor saw me he said it appeared to be shingles. In just a short time the spots had changed dramatically. I had not seen that they had multiplied. Mostly on my shoulder/chest/neck area. Also sent me to see primary dr. and I was given meds for the shingles.
As I type the shingles are very very sore. Very very itchy. Have taken benadryl and even that doesn't help the itch. The pain goes deep under my skin.
That's it for now cause I'm not feeling good. Can't wait to see what tonight brings me! Not fun at all.
Saturday, March 08, 2008
Our 28th Anniversary today
The snow storm started yesterday and is basically still going. A cold 20 degrees as I type this. The main storm started at about noon yesterday as I was getting my radiation treatment. And by 2 p.m. we got an email at work saying that the College would be closing at 3:30 p.m. due to inclement weather. That never happens. And as we left to go home, the roads were very bad. Just seemed that the trucks couldn't keep up with the storm. Shortly after I got home and safely into the house, Tim arrived home from school. That was a relief to me. A friend eventually came over to sleep at our house as his home is not in this town, a distance away. His parents told him to find a place to sleep and to stay put. So this is where he stayed. And it worked out great. He became Tim's buddy as they shoveled the driveway and deck.
Barry had gone in to work to cover for someone, but did get home later on in the evening. This was not the night to travel.
By morning, the snow was done but the drizzle came making for some icy conditions. Especially on walkways. Tim and his friend Joey went to the musical practice for most of the day. I headed out carefully to get some much needed groceries. Even the main roads were a mess. I was so glad to get home, where I have been ever since.
I took a nap in the afternoon. I've been experiencing different/newer pains this past week. Having trouble with just taking a deep breath. Plus my left shoulder area is hurting now. I'm so tired of having pain. Not a day goes by that I don't have some kind of pain. Painkillers have never taken the pain totally away. Hey, I truly know how lucky I am to be alive but I can still explain how I'm feeling. If not for me, but for others. I'm looking forward to the CT/PET scans that will be done this coming Tuesday. Once you've had cancer, any ache you have could eventuallly be something else.
Tim also took a nap later in the afternoon after his practice ended at 3:30 p.m. The snow has returned and it is a wintery night. Have heard it will be that way all night. Very windy. I don't think the driveway will be shoveled until the a.m. This time it will just be Tim.
And yes, today is our 28th anniversary. Unfortunately the weather has made us change our plans. We were going to go out for dinner tonight, but considering the weather we chose to delay it a week. Not worth getting into an accident. Tim also chose to stay home rather than go out with his friends.
Well, just starting to do my taxes. Hate this time of year....
Barry had gone in to work to cover for someone, but did get home later on in the evening. This was not the night to travel.
By morning, the snow was done but the drizzle came making for some icy conditions. Especially on walkways. Tim and his friend Joey went to the musical practice for most of the day. I headed out carefully to get some much needed groceries. Even the main roads were a mess. I was so glad to get home, where I have been ever since.
I took a nap in the afternoon. I've been experiencing different/newer pains this past week. Having trouble with just taking a deep breath. Plus my left shoulder area is hurting now. I'm so tired of having pain. Not a day goes by that I don't have some kind of pain. Painkillers have never taken the pain totally away. Hey, I truly know how lucky I am to be alive but I can still explain how I'm feeling. If not for me, but for others. I'm looking forward to the CT/PET scans that will be done this coming Tuesday. Once you've had cancer, any ache you have could eventuallly be something else.
Tim also took a nap later in the afternoon after his practice ended at 3:30 p.m. The snow has returned and it is a wintery night. Have heard it will be that way all night. Very windy. I don't think the driveway will be shoveled until the a.m. This time it will just be Tim.
And yes, today is our 28th anniversary. Unfortunately the weather has made us change our plans. We were going to go out for dinner tonight, but considering the weather we chose to delay it a week. Not worth getting into an accident. Tim also chose to stay home rather than go out with his friends.
Well, just starting to do my taxes. Hate this time of year....
Thursday, March 06, 2008
Pooped out - Day 11 of radiation
It started yesterday, the feeling of having no energy. I've had that same feeling when I had radiation 3 years ago. That's the good thing of keeping this blog. I can look back and see what was happening in the past. It was about my 15th treatment that this feeling of fatigue hit me back then. That's about the main side effect of radiation. I write this, not to complain, but to educate others who might at some time go through this. Just the other day I was talking to "Cookie" as we waited our turn for radiation. She has cancer of the vocal chords I believe. Had just began to feel tired and asked me about it. I explained to her what I had gone through previously. Just going through this you get to meet so many wonderful people. You can always strike up a conversation whether it's in the waiting room or after you are in the gown waiting for you turn for the radiation.
When the alarm rang this a.m., it took so much of me just to get out of bed. Was so tempted just to stay home and sleep. It's so hard to explain this feeling of being tired/fatigued. Different feeling than ever before. All day I counted down until I knew that by 5 p.m. I was going to be in my jammies, phone off the hook, and was able just to sleep for as long as I could. That ended up being 3 hrs. But like before, it's so difficult to get the 'umph back, the energy level back. But as I was told 3 years ago I'm doing quite a lot with working full-time and going through these treatments. People are often amazed when I tell them I am on my lunch break for my treatment, and that I'm rushing back so as not to be late. It's no wonder that I am pooped. I also was out Monday for my birthday, Tuesday for Tim's band banquet and last night for Tim's chorus concert.
Today's session was a bit different. Yesterday I had a couple of x-rays taken, normal for a Wednesday. Today I was told that the doctor had ordered some more to be taken today in order to make "an adjustment." For 45 minutes I lay still while about 8 x-rays were taken of my chest area. Then my chest was once again marked up to show the spot to be radiated. I was then given my treatment. Not sure what to make of these additional x-rays.
As I left, Dena (not sure of spelling) asked me for my blog address. She's the technician that took the digital pictures of me yesterday. She asked if I posted every day, to which I said usually. I told her that today's post would have to do with the reasoning of additional x-rays and what "an adjustment" truly meant. Only time will tell. I hope that she does explore my blog and perhaps leave a comment to know she's out there.
So, another day is done (finally). Next Monday will be last known radiation for me. The PET/CT scans being done on Tueday, March 11 will determine what the future holds for me. Keeping fingers/toes crossed, and yes- saying a prayer also.
When the alarm rang this a.m., it took so much of me just to get out of bed. Was so tempted just to stay home and sleep. It's so hard to explain this feeling of being tired/fatigued. Different feeling than ever before. All day I counted down until I knew that by 5 p.m. I was going to be in my jammies, phone off the hook, and was able just to sleep for as long as I could. That ended up being 3 hrs. But like before, it's so difficult to get the 'umph back, the energy level back. But as I was told 3 years ago I'm doing quite a lot with working full-time and going through these treatments. People are often amazed when I tell them I am on my lunch break for my treatment, and that I'm rushing back so as not to be late. It's no wonder that I am pooped. I also was out Monday for my birthday, Tuesday for Tim's band banquet and last night for Tim's chorus concert.
Today's session was a bit different. Yesterday I had a couple of x-rays taken, normal for a Wednesday. Today I was told that the doctor had ordered some more to be taken today in order to make "an adjustment." For 45 minutes I lay still while about 8 x-rays were taken of my chest area. Then my chest was once again marked up to show the spot to be radiated. I was then given my treatment. Not sure what to make of these additional x-rays.
As I left, Dena (not sure of spelling) asked me for my blog address. She's the technician that took the digital pictures of me yesterday. She asked if I posted every day, to which I said usually. I told her that today's post would have to do with the reasoning of additional x-rays and what "an adjustment" truly meant. Only time will tell. I hope that she does explore my blog and perhaps leave a comment to know she's out there.
So, another day is done (finally). Next Monday will be last known radiation for me. The PET/CT scans being done on Tueday, March 11 will determine what the future holds for me. Keeping fingers/toes crossed, and yes- saying a prayer also.
Wednesday, March 05, 2008
Monday, March 03, 2008
More than a Happy Birthday for me.
You know, you just can't beat this birthday. It's not just one day, it's many days.
I love birthdays, which to many would seem not the case.
After I had my radiation treatment today, as I was leaving the room where it's done, the whole staff greeted me by singing Happy Birthday. And I do mean the whole staff.
Talk about kindness and caring, this is what life should be all about.
When I got back to work, I cooked up hot dogs for the office. My birthday treat for my friends who are my co-workers. Usually people bake for their birthday, but since I'm not a baker I thought of this. I think everyone enjoyed themselves.
This morning my friend Lisa emailed me about taking me out for my birthday dinner after work today. We ended up meeting her husband at the Country Club where they are members. This was truly an experience that will also live on in my memory. The decor was gorgeous and the food was delicious. A real treat and a wonderful way to end my birthday.
I'm truly blessed! There is no better place to be than right here, right now.
Thanks.
I love birthdays, which to many would seem not the case.
After I had my radiation treatment today, as I was leaving the room where it's done, the whole staff greeted me by singing Happy Birthday. And I do mean the whole staff.
Talk about kindness and caring, this is what life should be all about.
When I got back to work, I cooked up hot dogs for the office. My birthday treat for my friends who are my co-workers. Usually people bake for their birthday, but since I'm not a baker I thought of this. I think everyone enjoyed themselves.
This morning my friend Lisa emailed me about taking me out for my birthday dinner after work today. We ended up meeting her husband at the Country Club where they are members. This was truly an experience that will also live on in my memory. The decor was gorgeous and the food was delicious. A real treat and a wonderful way to end my birthday.
I'm truly blessed! There is no better place to be than right here, right now.
Thanks.
Sunday, March 02, 2008
A nice pre-birthday weekend...
Last night we went out to dinner with some friends, all arranged by Becky. I call her a natural event organizer. This was all arranged in less than a day. She knew my birthday was tomorrow so she just made some calls and voila, a party was created. We went out for Mexican food. The staff was told it was my birthday so I was presented fried ice cream and everyone sang Happy Birthday to me. I also got to wear a huge colorful sombrero. My picture was taken by many cellphones, just have to figure out how to get a picture on my blog. It was a great evening.
This a.m. Tim and I once again went to church with Lisa and her family. Even though I served last night at our Catholic church I felt something inside to go again to their Baptist church. For now, as my life is, I've been getting something out of this church. Uplifting music, friendship and an understanding of "the message" as it is called. We often leave our church not "getting" what the homily is all about. We were used to such a more contemporary church when we lived on Long Island, a church that would often sing songs like "Awesome God." But here the congregation is different. No clapping of hands or songs that are contemporary. As I've said, I need that. So far now, I'm keeping an open mind. I think the most important thing is to Believe in God, no matter what. Who knows, perhaps I'll also check out the local Presbyterian church. Time will tell.
Tim and I went to the movies this afternoon. Heck I don't know the last time we did that. Large popcorn and large Pepsi. We saw Vantage Point. It was a pretty good movie. Was nice just to spend the time with Tim. That doesn't happen enough. He's usually going to the movies with a buddy, not with his mom. Was a nice present for me (even if I did pay the way!)
So tomorrow is my actual birthday. Yes I'll be 52 years young. Ever since being diagnosed with original cancer 3 years ago, I really do enjoy birthdays even more than I did previously. Never shy in telling people it's my special day!
Thanks to all for making this an even more special birthday.
This a.m. Tim and I once again went to church with Lisa and her family. Even though I served last night at our Catholic church I felt something inside to go again to their Baptist church. For now, as my life is, I've been getting something out of this church. Uplifting music, friendship and an understanding of "the message" as it is called. We often leave our church not "getting" what the homily is all about. We were used to such a more contemporary church when we lived on Long Island, a church that would often sing songs like "Awesome God." But here the congregation is different. No clapping of hands or songs that are contemporary. As I've said, I need that. So far now, I'm keeping an open mind. I think the most important thing is to Believe in God, no matter what. Who knows, perhaps I'll also check out the local Presbyterian church. Time will tell.
Tim and I went to the movies this afternoon. Heck I don't know the last time we did that. Large popcorn and large Pepsi. We saw Vantage Point. It was a pretty good movie. Was nice just to spend the time with Tim. That doesn't happen enough. He's usually going to the movies with a buddy, not with his mom. Was a nice present for me (even if I did pay the way!)
So tomorrow is my actual birthday. Yes I'll be 52 years young. Ever since being diagnosed with original cancer 3 years ago, I really do enjoy birthdays even more than I did previously. Never shy in telling people it's my special day!
Thanks to all for making this an even more special birthday.
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