This arrangement is from Cindy who could not make my luncheon. Beautiful person, beautiful flowers.

 
 

Jody, Me (eyes shut of course) and Terri: We are breast cancer survivors!

 
 

My boob cake: The breast is yet to come....

 
 

A GREAT DAY

Today I was honored at a luncheon by my girlfriends, who were my angels in preparing dinners for us while I went through chemo. I think there were more people at this lunch than at my wedding! I believe the end total was 16.. Can you believe that. And at this busy time of the year. It was a celebration of survival and also in honor of breast cancer awareness that was in October. I surprised them with dessert which was a BOOB cake made by Aileen's bakery. Her husband had presented her with this type of cake after her last radiation treatment. I think that the bakery should go into business just making these cakes. They also make penis cakes! if you are interested.. We had a lot of laughs with the cake. Especially when my friend did the cutting of it. Someone said she was doing a breast reduction. I felt so honored and blessed today. To think I have this many friends takes my breath away.

Upon coming home I had a floral arrangement delivered to me. It was a Christmas arrangement sent to me by a friend who couldn't make the luncheon, Cindy. Geez, can it get any better?

At about 5 p.m. I got a call from Tim. He got a 6 point BUCK!! So far he was the only person in his group that had any luck today. He was so excited. It was his first deer. Deer hunting is so popular in this community. They took a picture of him and the deer so hopefully it will come out and as you know, soon will be posted on my blog. I can't believe that I congratulated him for doing so, as I do love my deer! I definitely know that he will be hunting again next year. He's going to keep the antlers and make a display with them.

So yes, today is a great day. It's hard for me to type how blessed I feel, but know that I am.

Thanks for making this day special.

Happy December

Last night Tim had his soccer banquet and awards presentation. He was awarded a certificate for Most Improved Player by this team. Pretty cool. Am very proud of him.

I continued to do Christmas letters to be mailed shortly. A lot of work but well worth it. That's why I haven't been bloggin'. It was very important to me to put down in writing what we've been through this year.

This morning Barry had another chemo treatment. It looks like he will be having treatment until February 2006 and at that time he will have another PET and CT scan done. He continues to take thalidomide daily.

Tim's going hunting again this weekend. Will be leaving tomorrow afternoon for another "shot" at it. Even though he never got to take a shot, he still had a good time. It's all about friendship.

So it will be another weekend of just me and Barry. Not bad. Some friends of mine are hosting a luncheon for me on Saturday in celebration of Breast Cancer awareness month that was in October. I'm truly looking forward to it.

Christmas letter

This evening I am typing up Christmas letter. So I won't be bloggin..

A hunting we will go

Here's to a safe hunting season to all. And to friendship.

PS Run, Bambi, Run...

And at 9 p.m. Tim arrived home empty handed! Saw a lot of deer, but they were doe and he didn't have a license to shoot them. He said he had a great time and did enjoy himself. He also said that while walking to the place to hunt, it was very early and quite dark, with lots of hunters around. Could hear occassional shots being fired and just prayed that they weren't aiming at him.

Of the group he went with, only 1 deer was shot.

Maybe next time Tim will be luckier than the deer were today.

A quiet Sunday

Went out to dinner last night with Barry. Had my favorite dish chicken francaise. Boy is it quiet without Tim. He did call us last evening to tell us that they moved wood yesterday. Guess it worked out good that this family knows how to do that! Good practice. Hunting season actually starts tomorrow.

Yesterday I saw Michelle W. at the store with her family. She looked wonderful as usual. Already has got her hair colored. I also talked with Jody who is recovering from her recent surgery. And I got an email from Aileen yesterday. Geez, 3 bosum buddies in one day. How lucky can I be!

Today continues to be quiet. Temps have warmed up which made it nice for me to wash truck. Barry's off to work. And good news: Vikings beat the Browns and I finally got to see Mel Jr. play. Must have been a good feeling to beat his old team.

As for the blog and it's recent appearance, for some reasons you may not be able to go backwards. But after clicking away somehow, it did come back for me. Just don't know which button I pressed... I think when you press the time button next to where I do my posting, that causes only the current post to show. Hence, not a good idea. Better just to have the blogger heading block the top and be able to see all the daily blogs.

One year ago today

It was one year ago today that I had a sonogram on my right breast after noticing the lump. I was told that it was a swollen gland later. Huh. Certainly know now how wrong they were. It was my having this journal that I could look back and see where I've come from.

PS. To see the whole entry without the blogger heading, try hitting the time next to where is says posted by Jane.

A quiet day at work

Tim took off for his first hunting weekend in the morning. I know I'm going to miss him. Wondering how lucky he will be on Monday when the season officially begins.

It was such a quiet day at work today. Very relaxing for a change. In fact we put up our Christmas tree and did some decorating in between telephone calls. A good day.

Barry's off tonight and I made the Pepperidge Farm pastry dish with turkey and vegetables. Maureen, you've also made this. Nice and easy. Could have gone out to dinner but I had all the ingredients and it was a quick dinner. I have tomorrow to go out if we want to.

It's now 11 p.m. and I must admit this: went to bed at 7:30 p.m. (nothing on TV) and got up at 10:30 p.m.! Guess I'll call that a nap..... Haven't done that in a long time.

Happy Thanksgiving

Woke up to what you can see in my pictures. Temps in the low 20s and very windy. Lots of snow squalls. My day was made when as i was sitting at kitchen table I looked out back. And you do know what I saw. TWO deer making their way through the woods. I told them quietly "run." I absolutely love my deer.

After we had turkey leftovers, Barry went back to bed and Tim went to the shooting range. Had to get prepared for deer hunting season. Later in the evening, I packed for Tim's weekend. Lots of warm clothes. Temps today we below 20 degrees.

I made cupcakes for the boys to take hunting.

Looking towards our new driveway...

 
 

Wondering which holiday we are celebrating...

 
 

Looks more like Christmas than Thanksgiving...

 
 

First snow of season

Got about an inch of snow last night. Drove home in a blizzard. Internet was down all yesterday evening. Terrible service.

Well, today was another repeat of yesterday with more snow. Tim had a flute lesson scheduled for 6 p.m. but we didn't make it. In order to get there, we would have had to go down a very big hill (Volant) and there was no way I was going to attempt that. I told Tim that I just got through cancer and I wasn't going to kill both of us in a car accident. I pulled along side of the road, at the top of the hill, and could tell no one else was going down it. The cars coming up the hill were swerving all around. Put my blinkers on and turned around. Other cars followed. I then called and canceled the lesson. Not worth it.

Barry had put the turkey in the oven already as we had left for the lesson. So it worked out fine that I could continue to do the dinner. Barry's not been feeling good this past week. And today was no exception. There is discomfort in the area of the tumors. He went for his scheduled flu shot and did see an oncologist. Was given another prescription for pain killer. Past couple of days he has been taking them, but it does cause nausea. It just seems that the pain comes back when he is not receiving chemo. His next treatment is next week.

Barry rested as dinner was prepared. Got up to eat with us but didn't even finish his plate. Very unusual for him. He continues not to complain. It saddens me to know he is not feeling well. He is my hero.

So now that Thanksgiving dinner is done, I can rest tomorrow. I plan to stay in bed late. Tim is going to the shooting range in preparation of catching his first deer next week! Not sure if I'm rooting for him or for my deer....

Thoughts and prayers go out to J today

My bosom buddy J is having surgery this a.m. Positive energy is being sent her way today. She's one tough cookie.

Things I am thankful for...

It's hard to believe that Thanksgiving is a few days away. I've decided to write down a few things that I'm thankful for.

I'm thankful for:

Dr. Henwood, my surgeon
Dr. Garrow, my oncologist
Dr. Ulewicz, my radiation oncologist
the nurses and radiation technicians at the Cancer Center
the ability to reach up high without any pain
the ability to reach without any pain
the power of pain killers
the ability to sleep all night
not having any more night sweats
no more neulasta
no bad side effects from chemo and radiation
no more periods
all the delicious meals that my angels made for us
to all who chauffer Tim to and from activities
for such a great support system which consists of Barry and Tim, my family and my many old and new friends. And above all, I'm thankful to God for being by our sides these past few months.

I have never asked why, it's not my place to do so. I never knew the strength that both Barry and I have until now. I hope that others can learn from our ordeal as I have learned from others.

Best of luck to my bosom buddy who is having surgery tomorrow a.m. She's one of my angels.

Dad and Mom enjoy a nice fall day on Cape Cod. The tall sea grass makes for a great background.

 
 

The highlight of my day

Was a very relaxing day today. Was able to take a nice 2 hr. nap and woke up for the first time in a long time with bed head hair. I love my naps.

I had been pushing Tim most of the day to do his homework and practice flute. So after supper he went over to his backpack. It was then (at about 7 p.m.) that he realized he had not done his "grave rubbings" for his Latin class. So guess where we took an evening ride to? You guessed, to 2 local cemetaries. And thank goodness we weren't stopped by the police. End result, that homework is now complete.

This is a short week for Tim. He only has 2 days of school and then off for Thanksgiving. Kids (and teachers) are so lucky.

Moe and Gene also enjoyed the day. Cape Cod is beautiful in the fall.

 
 

Football season is now over

This morning Barry and I went shopping for shades for our first floor. We've been here 3 years and are now finally dressing the house up. We've ordered them and should have them in a couple of weeks. Will add insulation and warmth to the house.

Snuck in a quick nap before I brought Tim for band practice. I went to the school about an hour after he got there. I was able to help load all the musical instruments into the van. It was fun helping out. I got to chaperone the bus that Tim and the freshmen were on. On the way to the game, the exchange student Julia sat with me. She arrived in August and will stay until the end of the school year. She lives near Russia, someplace like Muldavia. Not sure of name. She has already graduated from school. Told me that she is taking calculus class here and that it is so easy. Compared to her education she told me that classes are easier here. Very smart girl. Communicates via email with her parents and sends digital pictures to them. She will be going with the band to Disney in April and is quite excited about it. Also told me that the dress code is different here. There she would be wearing high heels and dresses to school. She speaks about 5 different languages. I enjoyed talking with her.

As I sat in the bus I thought of how proud I was to be there. To have this opportunity of helping out in such a small way meant a lot to me. And chaperoning these kids is not work at all. A bunch of good kids.

I sat with Jody and her husband at the game. Barry sat with the Hoppe family. I knew it was going to be a long game when the other team scored a 90 yard touchdown within the first 14 seconds of the game. The score ended up being 21-0. We were the 0 score. So ends the football season and the band's marching. I certainly have enjoyed this season though. I've met so many wonderful people.

Barry couldn't wait to warm up after the game. Hottub and shower finally did the trick, along with tomato soup and grilled cheese sandwiches. I wasn't cold at all.
Terrible feeling when you are that cold. He's already under the covers now.

Hard to believe that Thanksgiving is this week. Followed by Tim's first hunting experience.

TGIF

Internet was down for me last night. Came up right before I went to bed.

Sure do miss it when it's down.

Tim has first flute lesson

After work today (which was an easy day), I took Tim for his first flute lesson. It was only a 1/2 hr. but as I sat in the woman's living room I could tell she knew her stuff. And she told him that in May her students get together for a recital at the local college. Tim was excited when he heard that. She only teaches the flute and piano.

We then went to the outlets nearby and bought Tim a new winter jacket and hat. The outlets were so dead. On the weekend they are jammed pack. What a difference. We ended our evening by going out for Mexican food (yes, again!).

So yes, it was a good day.

And yes, the damn blogger blocking header is back. Only good thing is that I know it once disappeared. Now you just have to wait a day to read the top lines you missed the day before.

PS. First snow flurries are coming down for this season! 34 degrees out now.

A better day

Even though it's raining outside, I'll make it a better day today. Off to early meeting. Am glad to know that many people experience cluttered brain syndrome, even when not related to chemo. I've never been alone and that is a blessing.

Work was better today. Actually at lunch, I sat in my truck and listened to a meditation CD that Linda had given me when I was first diagnosed. She is a cancer survivor. And honestly I had only listened to it a couple of times. Am thinking that perhaps during lunch I should start to meditate. To relax myself.

When I got home from work, I went over the lawn quickly with tractor and bagger to clean it up. By the time I finished I was using the lights on it. But boy did it look good. I really enjoy doing the lawn.

Tomorrow is Tim's first flute lesson. I'll be picking him up after work and going to the lesson with him. It's only a 1/2 hr. lesson, hope he learns something in that time. He'll be going once a week. He's been asking for this since the beginning of the year. Got postponed due my diagnosis of cancer.

Chemo-brain

Yes, there truly is a condition called chemo-brain. And at times I do believe that I have it. "People who have chemo-brain may find themselves unable to concentrate on their work, or unable to juggle multiple tasks. Some find they don't remember things as well as they used to.

Subtle or not, chemo-brain is frustrating to patients, who may suddenly find themselves unable to accomplish tasks they formerly completed with ease. And it's a mystery to doctors, who are still trying to understand what causes it and who is likely to suffer." The above statements are from an article I read by American Cancer Society.

The good news is that it should disappear in a year or two. Hard to explain what I feel in my head. At times my head seems so cluttered, not clear. Not sure if it's related to my personal situation, dealing with my own cancer along with dealing with Barry's cancer. I've always been one to rely on notes to remind myself but moreso now. I feel guilty when I'm feeling a bit down, as Barry is fighting for his life and is not outwardly complaining. I wonder if you get PMS when you no longer get your periods? Funny, huh! Could blame it on that.

I've always been honest and this is just another honest posting. Didn't help that today was a day from heck at work. You always pay for a holiday.

Thanks for listening. Tomorrow will be better day. And as my best friend Jody has told me: CANCER SUCKS

PS. Just got called to chaperone at Saturday's playoff game. Agreed to as this will be my first time doing so. Am pleased to be able to help out.

Sundays are a day of rest

At church today, Tim sat with his class. All the 8th and 9th graders who are making their confirmation in May signed a document showing their intentions. There was no confirmation done last year due to such a small group. So now they combine the classes. Tim will need to chose a sponsor for it. I can't understand why a parent can't be your sponsor. No one has actually given me a good answer to that question, including Father Phil. Because I think I would be the perfect fit sponsor.

I cooked a nice chicken roaster for lunch. Perfect timing as we walked into the house.

Barry went to work after lunch. I took a nap and boy did that feel good. Have missed my naps. After the nap, Tim and I delivered a couple of pies from the pie sale to a girl I work with. Then we went to WalMart to get Tim a hunting vest. In a couple of weeks he will be going deer hunting for the first time with the Pearsons. Am very greatful that they offered to take him since we are not hunters. And our likes/dislikes shouldn't stop him from trying something different.

A very relaxing day. Which is wonderful.

I helped out at the band's pie sale pickup this morning for about 3 hrs. Felt good to finally give some of my time to others. The band sold over 800 pies! I bought 3. And I already cooked one (just finished having a piece of the verry berry pie).
Delicous. I had to cook it, no room in the freezer! Good excuse.

After I came home, we did more raking of leaves in the front wooded section and garden section. And then we burned them. Oh, the good ole' smell of leaves burning. Bet you miss that smell, Dad. Yard is looking pretty good.

Barry worked a long time on my truck today. My windshield washer fluid wasn't pumping. But he finally diagnosed the problem and got the part for it, along with a new battery. So I'm in good shape.

Tim took off after noon to meet up with some band friends. They were playing at the playoff game this evening. Barry and I decided to stay home. Instead we did the shopping for my truck, Chinese buffet and then grocery store.

So it has been a productive 2 days for me and our lawn. Love being outside.

Barry's folks arrived home after about a 12 hr. trip. Glad I'm flying there next month and not driving. I can not stand that trip. Too long for me. We had a great time with them. Now I have to see if my mother-in-law will post on my blog after I showed her how to.

As for the chicken shit recipe, I'll post it soon.

Just heard on radio that our team WON 34-20 tonight! Guess Tim and the band aren't done playing football games yet.

A great Friday

After Tim got on the bus, I went back to bed for another hour. Boy did that feel great.

Barry went to his 11 a.m. chemo treatment. His mother went with him. I stayed home to do the lawn. I used my new bagging attachment for the ride on mower. It took me about 2 hours. 2 enjoyable hours outside. I really enjoy doing that kind of work. And to see the end result is wonderful. It was such a wonderful day, temperature wise and company wise. Barry's dad sat in the livingroom and was able to watch me.
Outside work to me is better than doing inside housework!

It was perfect timing. Barry came home just as I had started up the grill for burgers. His dad's first words to him were "how do you feel?." We've both been blessed since we've not had nausea with the treatments. Thank God. There are many who do experience such effect.

Since I was off today, I was able to spend the day with Barry's parents. It worked out perfectly. Tim walked home from school with our neighbor Tess today. She's our oncologist's daughter. A very nice girl. Tim went to the school play this evening for 2 reasons: extra credit for his honors english class and to see and be with his friends. And today was report card day. Dad, he continues to get the excellent grades. They don't have Honors Society at his grade level but I do believe he is on some kind of honors list. I am so proud of him as a person and as a son. A very well rounded boy. To be smart is one thing, but also to be a kind person is everything.

We went out to dinner at a BBQ type restaurant this evening. Another good meal. Thanks Mom and Dad! They will be leaving in the morning. Barry was able to spend every day with them which was their purpose in coming here. Family is so important.

PS. I see my blog blocking header is back! Shucks.

When my mother comes to visit us, this is her favorite sitting place. Notice my hair. This is the perfect length.

 
 

My mother-in-law Kay with God's country behind her.

 
 

Mom and Dad K. enjoy the views from our livingroom.

 
 

Today was my Friday at work because we're off tomorrow for Veteran's Day. It was made even better because it was a jeans day. I wish we could wear jeans everyday. For some reason, I feel people's attitudes are more relaxed while wearing jeans. I can never understand the need to dress up when you have no direct contact with the public. Oh well, that's life. Tim does have school tomorrow though. Lucky kid.

Since tomorrow is Friday, Barry will be going for his weekly chemo treatment. His mother will be going with him. I think this is a very nice gesture and am sure Barry will appreciate her company. When his brother was here he also went with Barry. Last night Barry wasn't able to sleep well. And the usual routine after chemo is being unable to sleep. I feel spoiled when I get a good night's sleep. And now when I do hear him snore, it's a good noise because I know he's sleeping.
Which for him is a treat. There were a couple of recent days that he stayed in bed late in morning. I told him that's good, with everything he's going through why not.

Today Barry took his parents into Ohio. They went to the apple orchard and bought more apples. I've really been enjoying the apples this year.

For dinner I made what I call "Jane's chicken shit". If you're one of the lucky ones, you've tasted it. Made with chicken tenderloins, bread cubes, chicken soup sauce over broccoli. Very tasty and easy. I had got it partially prepared before I went to work this morning.

Not sure what activities are planned for tomorrow. Time will tell.

PS. I showed my mother-in-law how to post on my blog this evening. I look forward to reading her first post!!

Family

Barry and his parents stayed home today. And just basically talked. Am sure that they had a good time in doing so. Barry took tonight off to be with them.

We went out to dinner at one of our favorite restaurants, The Iron Bridge. I was able to use gift certificates that my friends gave me from the bank along with one that Barry had got from his job back in April. I had been saving them for a special occasion and this was it.

It's now 8 p.m. and the folks have retired to their private living quarters. I think it's actually a bit past their bedtime!

Barry's parents arrived after about a 10 1/2 hr. trip. That's a long trip to make.
Am glad they made it safe and sound.

Very short blog tonight. Watching a good movie...

A windy but enjoyable day

The only time I left the yard today was to go to church and grocery store. We had a little bit of everything today. But the common thing was wind. Very windy at times. Yesterday I bought the bagger attachment for our tractor, and today Tim attempted to gather up the leaves in it. But this year it seems that all the leaves are coming down at once. He would make one sweep of the lawn and it would be filled. And then the rain came. Didn't last for long, but enough that he had put the mower away. The wind proved to be our friend though today. Most of the leaves that were in the yard blew away. Tim will clean up the rest tomorrow. He has no school.

For dinner I thawed out some chicken soup that I had froze a couple of months ago. One of our angels, Kelly, had made it for us. And today was the perfect time to thaw it out. It will also make a good lunch this week.

Barry's parents arrive tomorrow afternoon. We're looking forward to their visit. Not sure exactly when. I've made an apple pie this afternoon in preparation for their arrival. I've also made tomorrow's dinner as they may be here when I come home from work. This way it's all done. Did my household chores, just about done. Last thing to do will be to "tidy" up my kitchen counter.

PS. No naps this weekend!

I love my Saturdays

I took advantage of it being a Saturday and slept late. Love the late morning.

Picked Tim and Josh up from sleepover at noontime. I had already mulched the lawn.
He told me that he slept about 4 hrs. last night. We came home, Tim took a quick shower and then I took him for a much needed hair cut. Hopefully if tomorrow's a nice day I'll take pictures of both of us together.

It was another gorgeous day here.

Barry, Tim and I went out for Mexican food (again) tonight. I really enjoy it.

As soon as we got home, Tim got a phone call from Annie. She wanted to know if he was going to the football playoff game tonight. It's not our school that's playing, but they are renting our stadium. I believe our school will be playing next week, heaven knows where. So I just dropped him off at the school. What a crowd there.
And this is only high school football!

Friendship

Tim went to a sleepover with a few of his buddies after school today. Hopefully it won't be a night without sleep. Worked out good that Lisa could chauffeur him to the party and I will do the reverse drive home.

I had an appt. after work to meet with Fr. Philip at our church. There was an article in the church bulletin looking for eucharistic ministers. And it caught my eye. I called him and this meeting was scheduled. When we lived on Long Island I was one. We met for about 1/2 hr. They will schedule a get together soon to go over the instructions. Perhaps by the first of the year I will be doing this for the church.

After I left the rectory, I called in for my messages at the house. One was from Barry, the other from my friend BJ. Barry had another weekly chemo appt. I actually thought it was going to be a non-chemo day because it wasn't listed on his appt. paper. But he did get it. That guy is so strong, along with good veins. Probably the first of the year he will have another PET scan.

BJ's message was asking if we wanted to go out to dinner as a group. I called her on my cell phone at the right time. Since I had nothing planned for the evening I said sure. I can't believe that I've gone out to dinner two weeks in a row with friends. As they say, only in America! I've got such wonderful friends. Tina and her two boys, the Hoppes, BJ and her guys and me. An evening with uninterrupted conversation. I love it. Truly priceless.

Geez, I've got a new bloggin' friend Megan! But I did not get the usual hug last night. Think she was too busy, so she owes me one next time. The concert was great. Even though the songs will be the same all year, I still enjoy seeing and hearing them play. There are a lot of talented kids in that school.

I've been having some ankle pain past couple of weeks. I had been living with the pain since heck, I've been through cancer I can be tough! Discomfort when I am walking. Started off with just one ankle and then yesterday the other ankle became sore. This morning it hurt a lot as I went to work. Figured it was time to make a doctor's appointment. I was able to get an afternoon appt. with my medical doctor. Last night I mentioned it to my oncologist (his daughter is in the band) and he mentioned that normal aches are hidden while going through chemo due to the strength of the drugs. Today the doctor said tendinitis and gave me script for an anti-inflamatory. Will start the pills tomorrow. Also told me to put some ice on the ankles.

Barry was outside for about 5 hrs. today doing yard work. Trimming and getting rid of leaves. The yard looks great.

We went out to dinner this evening. Just got home short while ago.

Not sure if I mentioned this but my friends want to take me out to dinner soon, a girls night out. And it will be for breast cancer month which was in October. I was approached last night by one of my friends who was involved in planning it. How kind of them. I've also invited two of my bosom buddies to come, Jody and Aileen. Hope they can come and celebrate being survivors.

That's it for now....

CONGRATULATIONS AILEEN!

You made it to the finish line of chemo and radiation. And as you well know:

"the breast is yet to come!" (PS. Hope you don't mind me stealing that quote!"

Tonight is Tim's first high school concert. Looking forward to seeing him perform, and of course seeing all the kids. The kids are always so kind to me. There is one girl, Megan, who will always greet me with a hug. My kind of a person. She makes me feel like a queen. And I thank her.

Happy Halloween!

Since we were short 2 people today at work, it was a busy but OK kind of a day. Just did what we could do. In the afternoon we had trick or treaters in our building. You couldn't really enjoy them since the phones continued to ring.

Tomorrow evening Tim will be performing in his first high school concert. I'm really looking forward to that. He'll be playing the songs that they learned in band camp, some of which they play at football games. Should be fun.

That's it for now.

PS. Just got off the computer where I was able to webcam my sister Eileen and my parents. They had not seen my new hairdo. I think they were pleased with what they saw. My sister said that my hair is just about as long as her hair is! We like short hair........I still can get up in the morning and not worry about combing it. Low maintenance.

Yeah! The blog header is gone!!!!!!!!!!!

It was another gorgeous day in Western Pa. Tim mowed the front lawn, and I did the back lawn.

I took him and a couple of his friends over to the movies this afternoon. I think this is about the only time we've been apart all weekend. While he was gone I made chicken marsala for Barry. Definitely not for me. I am not a mushroom lover. But he will certainly enjoy it. He doesn't request much so it's only fitting that I make something he asks for.

Have got word that Barry's parents will be coming for a visit next week. We are really looking forward to that. Nothing like family.

I talked to one of my bosom buds this evening. Her last radiation treatment is November 1st. She went through chemo and radiation. She told me that she called her radiation treatment her "tanning sessions"! You have to make the best out of the situation to get yourself through it. Congratulations Aileen!! You are a true survivor and I'm so glad you came into my life.

Hometown fun

After sleeping in a bit today, we decided to go to the Outlets. Aeropastle had a big sale this weekend, 50% off everything in the store. That was the reason we went, but we ended up buying Rockport shoes and a new leather jacket at Wilson's leather. We couldn't believe the big savings at the stores. May go back tomorrow to check them out again. I love a good sale.

Today our town at it's Halloween parade. One of the top things that happen in our town. I was asked to be one of the chaperones for Tim's band. It was the first time I was able to volunteer. It was so much fun for me. I was so proud to walk next to and with the band. A great bunch of kids. About 1/2 of them dressed in costumes. Tim was not one of them. Maybe next year he will.

After the parade we were invited to go out to dinner with our friends: the Hoppes, LeJeunes and BJ. Some familiar names if you read my blog. Friendship is what has kept us going. We had such a great time. The teenage boys were able to sit by themselves. I felt pretty lucky to know that Tim chose to come out to dinner with us rather than go to a friend's party. You never know how long that will last.

I look back at today and come away feeling pretty blessed. Able to spend all day with family and friends. You can't beat that. I didn't even have a nap.

Thank you.

I love this town...

Toby Keith is a country singer who sings a song "I love this bar." Once again this evening I went to our local football game to listen to Tim play in the band, and of course socialize. I just have to say this: I love this town. There is so much friendship there. I had to show off my haircut to everyone I met. They all loved it. If only I could remember everyone's name who I meet at each game. My memory wasn't good before chemo, and now it's even worse. Chemo brain. And this condition does truly exist. I watch about 10 % of the game (in fact we did win) and the rest is just talking to good friends. Tim's friends in the band are so nice to me. Never thought I would be enjoying high school football.

Our team has made playoffs so there will be a few more games to attend. Tonight it was so cold. Low temps in the 30's. Glad I wore insulated underwear along with gloves. For the remaining games I'll have to really dress for warmth.

That's it for today. Looking forward to no alarm clock tomorrow morning. And also looking forward to our town's Halloween parade in the afternoon.

Guess what I did today?

Sue, we went to the Amish stand this past Saturday but the man was not there. It was self-service. And with this rain, that's the way it usually is. Will look into her condition perhaps this weekend.

After work today I went and had my nails done. And I wonder if anyone guessed what I did today... I got my hair trimmed! around my ears and back by my neck. A girl I worked with said that I needed to "clean it up" some. It does look good. Retta, my nail person, tried to spike it but it's not quite long enough. I really like the length that it is now. I can still roll out of bed and not have to do anything with my hair. No bed head.

Does anyone else have trouble reading the top of my blog? When I view it, the blogger advertisement cuts off the subject area of the recent blog. I've emailed them but have not got an answer back. Just wondering.

A day to comfort a friend

When I look back at today, what sticks in my mind is comforting a girl who I work with. When she came to work she was in tears as she walked by my desk. I am known as a giver of hugs, and I immediately put my arms around her and brought her to the bathroom. She's going through boy friend problems. It hurts me to see someone so distressed. I definitely don't have the solution or answer to her problem, but it's so important just to show compassion when someone is down in the dumps. I may not go to church every week but I do believe that living by caring is what it's all about.

When I got home there was a message on my machine. Someone was asking if I could chaperone the band at the Halloween parade this Saturday. I had put the word out that I was able to help out if needed now that I'm done my treatment. I returned the call and said yes, I would be happy to help out. Just a little something but it does make me feel good to do.

I've also heard that a bosom buddy of mine is having some additional breast surgery mid November. I ask that you keep her in your prayers while she prepares for this surgery, and for a speedy recovery. She was actually my first bosom buddy since I was diagnosed. She continues to be my inspiration.

No new job for me

I got the call from HR today that I didn't get the job that I had applied for in Electronic Banking. Just not in my cards I guess. I have to believe that something better is going to come to me. If I tried to second guess and figure out why things happen to me/us, I would go crazy. What will be will be.

In the back of my head I still would love to work at the local college. That's been my dream since moving here. It's such a good place to work, that it's very difficult to get a job there.

Short blog today. Thanks for listening to me.

When I got home from work today, I saw a deer in the backyard. I haven't seen a deer for such a long time. Tim has seen one in the morning after I have left for work. And then two more arrived. As usual I said to them, "God bless you. You are so special. And please be careful, next month the boys will be after you!" I had to grab a picture just to show you. You will only see 2 of them, the other was still in the woods.

That's the highlight of my day. I'm easily thrilled.

Tim's got a sore throat so he has orders to stay away from Barry. He did go to school today. It was his last soccer game and since it was raining, he felt he couldn't miss it!! Oh well. I've medicated him the best I can. When he left his bedroom this morning, I sprayed lysol.

Well, that's it for today. No word on job. That's fine though.

My day has been made...

 
 

Sunday

Barry cooked another great meal for us today. Marinated flank steak with some great seasonings, and cooked it on the grill. Unlike when I cook it, it was just perfect. Nice and juicy. Along with mashed potato and corn. Can't get much better.

Tim and I did lawn duty, ours and the neighbor's. I love being outside and just cutting the lawn. Quite easy when all you have to do is sit and drive the mower. Tim did weedwacking and raking. Both lawns look great.

Tim got together with 2 of his friends and went golfing today. For $4.00 they played 9 holes of golf. Pretty inexpensive fun. I wish he would do that more often.

We cooked 2 loaves of bread for Tim's latin class. It's for extra credit. Believe me, I'm no cook. That's why Tim didn't mention it to me earlier. Figured I was not up to it then. Had never made it before, called pompeian bread. Would like to taste it but have to send both in to school. Hope they enjoy it. I also made another apple pie this evening. Barry keeps going to the orchard, and I keep making pies. Mmmmm.

A rainy day

Tim had a friend sleep over last night. And do you know what time we all got out of bed? Just about noontime! Geez,I felt like a teenager. The boys went to bed probably around 3 a.m. ish, and I went to bed around 11 ish. Guess I got enough sleep. Sure did feel great. I would wake up every so often, look at the clock, know that it was raining, and then go back to sleep. Haven't had a sleep like that in a long time.

After bringing Andrew home, we went to the outlets to do some shopping. I was surprised at how busy the stores were. A dreary rainy day.

I went to see Tim play a soccer game in the rain this evening. It was the last game that I would see this year. He plays his official last game on Monday after school, but I'll be at work. They tied and the game was pretty even. I have enjoyed watching him grow this season.

We came home to a home cooked meal prepared by Barry. He stayed home due to the weather. No need to get sick. He had cooked "city chicken", mashed potato and a nice red cabbage dish. And of course, gracy. What a nice treat.

After dinner, I went in the hot tub. First time in months that I've enjoyed it. While going through radiation I was not able to, plus the summer was so hot. I enjoy the using it when the temps are cool. The best time is during a snow storm.

Interview today

I had the interview for the job with Electronic Banking today. Have been asked how it went. I tell them that I did the best I could, not sure if it's a better job but at least it's a different job for me. And now it's out of my hands. What will be will be. Life will go on whether I get the job or not.

Barry and I chose not to go to the high school game tonight due to the rain. Neither of us needs to get sick. Raining and temps in 40 degrees. Tim will have fun, at least at 3rd quarter when the kids can socialize with their friends.

Barry had another chemo treatment today. Will be interesting to see if he continues with the side effects he had last week. Hopefully not. For the first time since getting chemo he needed procrit today. Low white blood counts I believe. Just on the border.

Tim has his last weekend soccer game tomorrow evening. Always a short season. I've enjoyed seeing him play this year. He's really advanced since last year. Especially in the speed department.

Dr's Visit today

I met with Dr. Garrow today. Everything is fine and I don't have another appt. until next May. Have scheduled a mammogram in March. Pap smear will be scheduled in the spring sometime. While there I got a flu shot at his recommendation.

I have an interview with another department at the bank tomorrow morning. Don't know if it's a better job for me, but as it is now I come home often in a bad mood. Not the best way to treat myself and especially Tim. I'm not nervous at all since I know the woman who is the boss, and because it's only a job. Don't sweat the small stuff!

I have written the blog support people. I don't know why their blue header is covering up the top of my blogs. Very annoying to me. Hopefully they will respond to my email.

Tim and Annie at Homecoming Dance Oct. 1, 2005

 
 

Mid week

I had a good day at work today. Just felt good. Actually came home in a good mood. How strange is that..

For dinner I made an easy chicken and vegetables in cream sauce, which is placed in a Pepperidge Farm pastry shell. Mmmm. Nice and easy. My kind of dinner.

I got Tim's picture back from homecoming. The picture is one of the best I've seen of him. Annie looks gorgeous. They made a cute couple. And if you know me, I'll probably be posting it on my blog eventually. Just need to have it scanned.

That's it for today. Night.

Since it's Tuesday, it's Subway day for Tim and myself. Otherwise known as another day I have no clue what is for dinner!

As soon as I got home, I washed my truck. It was so dirty. We ate our subs and then Tim did his homework. He wanted to go see the Varsity soccer game. I dropped him off so he could. Am so glad that he is outgoing.

Just picked him up and he's finishing up his homework.

I guess it's good that there isn't much to report lately on my blog. I continue to feel everyone's prayers. The redness signs of my radiation are slowly disappearing. I get to see Dr. Garrow (my oncologist) this Thursday. Haven't seen him as my doctor since I finished chemo. Have seen him socially though. I guess then I will have more information on what will be happening with me now. I expect I will need to catch up on mammogram (yuck) and pap smear tests. Had those on hold while going through treatment.

Another busy day

Nothing new to report. Just that I'm here and about to go to bed. I can't go to bed without at least posting a quick hello!

Used a comb today (for a few strands of hair)!

Matt left by 5 a.m. this morning. We had such a great visit with him. House is once again quiet.

After taking a shower this morning, I had to use a comb for the first time in months! A wee bit around my ears. Can't remember the last time I had one in my hands...

I went to a shower this afternoon for a friend of mine. Had a great time. While I was gone, Tim rode bikes with a friend. I have to say this about Tim, he sure does enjoy riding his bike. Usually he rides by himself. A bike ride for Tim is about 10 miles. Hopefully he'll continue this activity. He even likes to ride in the winter wearing his under armor shirt.

I took a chance and made american chop suey for dinner. It was the recipe that Barry had made a week or so ago. Nice and tasty, and the best thing it's easy to make. For dessert I'm going to have some homemade apple pie.

I look back at such a nice few days. And I didn't nap on either weekend day. It was so nice just laying in bed in the evening and listening to Barry talk with his brother Matt. I continue to have such admiration for Barry. Even with not feeling 100% yesterday, he never complained. Can't say that about many people.

Thanks Matt for coming to see us. And for giving Barry a hand.

Can you believe I didn't post anything yesterday! My sister once told me that is good. Means I'm busy.

Tim went to football game. The team won again. 7 wins 0 losses. While he was away, Barry, Matt and I went out to dinner. Was nice just having someone else to talk to. During the day, Barry and Matt spent time together and went to a Mexican restaurant.

Already today, I've bought Tim his first hunting license! The Pearsons have kindly offered to take him hunting with their boys. He's quite excited. If not for others, am sure he wouldn't have had a chance to go otherwise. Thanks Mike!

Tim played soccer away today. Just a couple of towns away. It was a great game. Tim scored a goal which was great for all of us to see. And the team won. You can't beat that. After the game, Tim stayed to watch the Varsity team. They didn't do as well. They lost their game.

While Tim was enjoying the other soccer game, we went home. Matt helped Barry move bags of coal that were purchased last winter from outside the house to the coal bin. That was a lot of help. After cooking burgers on the grill, I made an apple pie. (which we will enjoy later). And then I cut the lawn. Matt and Barry then installed the router for our outside antenna. Barry had purchased that while back. Should have got pictures of both of them up on the roof together.

We are about to go out for Mexican food. Tim couldn't get enough soccer so he's watching the girls play their game now. He is lucky to have such good friends, boys and girls. I think it's all in having a good attitude. Until later....

Matt was able to help Barry install router for antenna. Thank you, Matt.

 
 

Tim is my best friend!

 
 

Matt, Me and Barry. What a nice picture taken by Hoppe.

 
 

Tim's soccer game

 
 

Matt and Barry watch Tim play soccer.

 
 

Tim in action. Runs so much faster this year.

 
 

Matt arrives

Barry's brother Matt arrived this evening just in time to see Tim play at his soccer game. Wasn't able to see Tim score, but at least saw Tim play well. Matt has been at meetings in Ohio and has taken the time to stop here for a visit with us. It's good seeing him. And even though it may not be in the top 10 things to do with your brother category, he will be going with Barry to his chemo treatment in the morning. That's a good brother!

Short blog tonight. Want to enjoy Matt's company.

Barry's taking tomorrow night off to be with Matt. Probably will be going to see the football game. Weather and time will tell.

Setting priorities

After feeling sorry for myself last night, I've come back to reality. Have to prioritize things. A job is just a job, shouldn't be my main concern. Will apply for jobs, but can't get so discouraged. It's all in God's hands.

Hey Hoppe. Where were you last night when I was indulging in self pity? Thanks for those wise words.

I did apply for the job in another department today. Actually had mini tour of what the job would be all about. The manager of the dept. invited me in for that. Sounds interesting to me. Just need a change after doing present job for 2 1/2 years. And I won't sweat the small stuff if I don't get it!

Went to Tim's open school night. It was nice meeting his teachers. Just don't ask me their names.. Chemo brain.

Didn't get job

A very busy day at work. Holidays are never worth having. Work is always double when you return.

After work I went to see Tim play soccer. Unfortunately, they lost. But I do enjoy seeing him play.

When I got home, there was message from the Director at the Cancer Center. She told me that I did not get the job. Two people who applied internally got the positions. She left me her phone # and told me that she would forward my resume to HR dept. Am thankful that Dr. Garrow at least gave her my resume and also that she had courtesy to call me. So many times you can apply for a job and never hear from the company. I guess it wasn't meant to be. And Dad, I will apply for the job at the bank in the other dept. tomorrow.

Tomorrow is open school night for Tim which I'll be attending. And Barry's brother Matt is arriving in the evening. Will be here for a few days. Looking forward to his visit, as I am sure Barry is.

I worked from 9 a.m. til noon today. Our bank purchased another bank, and therefore some departments had to work to make sure the conversion was a success. And it was. Nice and smooth. Small purchase, only consisted of 4 branches.

While at work I looked online for internal job postings. Actually found one that just got posted on Friday. It's in a department that I know someone, and I'm also friendly with the manager. Have already emailed both of them to see what the job is all about. It would be a lateral move, but after a couple of years where I am it is time for a change. I've also applied for a job at the Cancer Center. Time to move forward for me.

When I got home, Barry suggested going out to lunch. And I always jump for that opportunity.

Tim had Sean come over and they completed a project that is due this Friday. Good job boys! And while they worked, I took a nap. Mmmmm.

Am making macaroni and cheese now. Can you smell it?

Barry cooked a nice lunch (dinner) for us today. Porkchops with apples on top, along with rice in the presscure cooker. Had the acorn squash also from our Amish farmer. What a tasty meal. Made tastier because I didn't have to cook it! Then he went to work.

Tim went to a buddy's house for a couple of hours to play and make dirt bike paths. It was on our way there that I took the pictures that are posted on my blog today.

I heard from my sister today that her husband WON a 2002 red Camara limited edition convertible! He bought the ticket on Father's Day weekend. That certainly is good news. Can't wait to see pictures of them and the car.

And of course, I took a nice nap. Have to say most naps are good!

By the way Maureen: I also have a chance to win a red convertible car. The drawing is in 2 weeks and I have the WINNING ticket. A local church is raffling off the mate to your car!! When I win it, I'm going to have Barry drive to the Cape to show you it. Yes, since Barry was diagnosed he has been looking at convertibles. And this is going to be my gift to him....

Check out that hair! I still don't have to comb it. Low maintenance. 

It's amazing how fast the seasons change. 

This is what living in God's country is like. The Amish stack the corn stalks and eventually take them away. 

This shows the effects of radiation. Still have to use aloe and cream. It's itchy like a sun burn, but I do not itch it. A nice oval area that covers where the cancer was and surrounding area. 

Touching others is what it's all about..

Since Barry had his chemo yesterday, he wasn't able to sleep much last night. Went to bed at about 5 a.m., just worked on his computer rather than toss and turn in bed. Even with his new drug which is supposed to cause sleepiness, the steroid was stronger. Then he got up at 10:30 a.m. to take Tim dirtbiking.

Tim went dirtbiking with his buddies today for a few hours. One of his friends Josh F. had moved to Tennessee and came to visit for a couple of days. So the kids were able to spend time with him.

While he was gone, Barry and I went to butcher and got some groceries. And had a quick bite to eat.

After we picked up Tim we went to local Amish stand to buy a pumpkin and some fresh veggies. Actually were able to buy some tomatoes still. As we were standing at the stand, the Amish man said he thought he knew us from before. Said that in the spring at his greenhouse, he had met a woman going through breast cancer, along with her husband who had shaved his head in solidarity. I told him that it was not us. I could tell by his tone of the conversation that he was really interested in our story. We explained the situation and he brought up the fact that his wife is having a procedure this week to see if she has breast cancer. He was full of questions: should someone go through chemo and radiation? was one of them. Told him that going through treatment was better than dying. And that the uncertainty/waiting for a diagnosis is very hard. I also told him that God gives you the strength to go through these trials. He mentioned that his wife Nancy had spoke about this earlier couple to him, wishing she could talk to that woman about breast cancer. I joked with him about him not being able to go online to read my journal, and his wife not being able to call me to talk. He said that she would be able to call me and asked for my phone number. Of which I gave him.

I've realized since being diagnosed that I talk to everyone now who will listen to me about cancer. You don't know how good I felt as I left that Amish man. If you touch one person/help one person, than I think you're doing what God wants you to do. To minister. I've explained this to Tim. And it only makes me feel that perhaps helping others in the cancer field is my true calling after all these years. It's strange how things happen for a reason. Just this week I applied at a local hospital to work at the Cancer center where we've been treated. Maybe God does work in mysterious ways!

As I was cutting onions tonight, I cut my thumb. Was only a small cut. Put bandaid on it immediately, and do you know that it kept bleeding right through it. Had to put paper towel around it tightly. And it continued to bleed for about an hour. Proof that my blood counts are down a bit. First cut I've got since going through treamtment. Am thinking that is platelet related. Notice also that I bruise easier than before. My counts are not what they used to be, I'm sure of that.

An end of a pretty good week....

I got another beautiful arrangement from Marti who works at a branch today. I've been truly blessed with such a great support system.

Barry had his second chemo with new drug this morning.

Tim's at a football game this evening. I stayed home, not a good night to be outside. Felt like taking it easy instead. Drizzling outside.

________________________

I just wanted to show you the email that my boss sent out to all the employees in our building on my last radiation day:

"As many of you know, Jane Kaminske has been bravely battling breast cancer. Since March, Jane has gone through 3 surgeries, 4 chemotherapy sessions and 36 radiation treatments. Through all this, she has come to work with a smile on her face and a positive attitude.

As of today, Jane will have successfully completed her treatments! This is a huge accomplishment and we would all like to congratulate Jane. Please join us in the Retail Support area for a celebration. We will serve cake to everyone at the Technology Center. Please stop by this afternoon anytime (except from 2:30-3:30, for Jane will be at her last treatment) to help us congratulate her success!"

__________________________________

Sums up what I've been through these past 7 months. Very nice.

Nice not having radiation

It was so strange when I looked at the clock today and it was 2:40 p.m. I wasn't at radiation!

It was another good day at work today.

I'm a bit tired today, that's why the late blog posting. Couldn't stop yawning on the way home from work. Hopefully will hit the bed early tonight.

Barry goes for his weekly chemo appt. tomorrow morning. As always, he continues to work and not miss any time. He's so strong.

Well, that's it for now.

Dr. Garrow and myself. I was given a certificate showing that I completed radiation treatment. He told me to show my strength. 

Three of my technicians. Also called angels.