Nantucket Island and Mary Lou

Maureen, Mom and I got the 6:30 a.m. high speed ferry to Nantucket Island. In one hour, we were on the island. Mary Lou, a girl friend of mine for over 40 years met us at the boat and took us for a tour of the WHOLE island. You couldn't have asked for a better tour guide. We saw every memory that we had, even took pictures of our old house that we sold in 1965 when my brother Doug was born. We talked to a man on the porch who said that his parents bought the house in 1965. Probably the people my parents sold house to.

So much to write about, more to follow.

Barry and Tim arrived on the Cape at about 9 a.m. 12 hr. ride for them.

The next couple of days I won't be posting. Will be spending time with the family and that's what I came to do. I only have Sunday and Monday left...

Great seeing everyone.

Friday on Cape Cod/See Doug and family today

I had so many dreams last night. So much "input" yesterday into my brain. It was such a great show last night that it was on my brain as I lay in bed.

Looking forward to seeing my brother and his family today.

Barry and Tim leave to come here sometime late this evening into the early morning of Saturday. Not sure yet. Am hoping they avoid any rain/bad weather from a storm in the area. They have a long trip ahead of them, not like the 1 hour or so plane ride I had.

Shortly after we returned from grocery shopping, Doug and his family arrived in their 38' motor home. They had been vacationing on the Cape this week. I had not seen my sister-in-law and niece for over a year. Last year I had seen Doug when I was on the Cape. Been too long. Doug, since he's a chef and owner of a restaurant, cooked us up a feast on Dad's new grill. Sirloin tips, burger, ribs and chicken. Even on his days offs he enjoys cooking. Have never had a bad meal.

And then Roger arrived later in the afternoon. He's my brother-in-law, married to Eileen. Never a dull moment with him in the house. A lot of fun to be with.

While everyone napped during the afternoon, Mom and I snuck off for some ice cream. I think I was only one who didn't nap today. Didn't want to waste any time sleeping.

The last of the family arrived a short while ago, Gene. He's married to my other sister Maureen. I can't even remember the last time I saw him. So right now we have a full house (almost). Barry and Tim will be leaving any moment from Pennsylvania to come here. About a 12 hr. trip for them. I will be relaxed once they are here. It's a long trip for one person to be driving the whole way.

Signing off for the day. Tomorrow a.m., bright and early, Maureen, mom and I are taking ferry to Nantucket to see Mary Lou. Won't be online much tomorrow. Too much excitement. And then we will be seeing Barry at the campground.

Fresh Cape Cod Air.....

Well, the different state did not cause the night sweats to disappear. Could only wish.

But here I am on Cape Cod. Ready to enjoy my first full day. My sister Maureen will be arriving by noon. Can't wait to see her. Have nothing planned to do (as far as I know). A cool overcast day with temps in 50s. Not going to get any better I guess.

Mom and I went to the Mall and I finally bought a pair of hoop earrings. We're such good shoppers, we got out of the mall within an hour. I also was ready for my next Cape Cod meal.

By the time we got home, Maureen had arrived. Went out to another seafood restaurant, Cook's, and once again had fried shrimp. I think I'm going to turn into a shrimp. Can't get this kind of food in Western Pennsylvania. Delicious. We took Mom to get a haircut and while Moe was inside with her, I noticed a nice looking man heading in there. I was outside waiting. I said to him "if you go in there, you'll come out looking like me." He didn't laugh like I expected, but looked serious. When he entered the store, he made comment to my family questioning if in fact the store had shaved my head. Mom said no, that I was going through chemo. Also, said that Barry was going through same treatment. He then turned and looked out the window at me and laughed. Boy, when Mom and Maureen came out we had such a belly laugh! Felt so good to laugh. I also had a woman from the store take our picture standing outside the sign saying ProCuts. You have to make the most out of life!
Would have made a good segment for Girls Behiving Badly or Candid Camera.

Mom, Maureen and I are heading to a show of some kind at the Sheraton Hotel tonight. It's male twins/ Edwards Twins/ who impersonate singers both male and female. Looking forward to that. By the way their website is www.theedwardstwins.com if you want to read about them. (I'm not getting paid to tell you this!)

At the show, two sisters (one from Florida and the other from Ct.) and their parents from Hyannis sat with us. You couldn't ask for better company. I think the sisters were in their 40s, so basically same age group as us. The show was wonderful. I can't even remember all the celebities we saw perform: Cher, Elton John, Sonny Bono, Neil Diamond, Bette Midler and Barbra Streisand. They performed every detail to the point while you were watching them perform, it was the actual singer, including Barbra's hand motions to her hair and Elton's facial expressions. For 90 minutes I was elsewhere and chemo free. It was a good group to sit with and be with, clapping and enjoying the show. They do not lip sync, they actually do the voice impersonations. Truly amazing. It was Maureen's idea to get out and I'm so glad she had this idea.

After the show, I took pictures of one of the twins along with our table of friends. (Pictures of my vacation will follow when I return home to download them).
I told this man my personal story and that I was truly touched by their performances. He in return gave me a special hug. I handed him and the people I sat with a small personalized card that I created showing my blog address. I love to share my/our story with others who touch my heart. It's truly amazing how people come into your life and make it that more memorable.

Tomorrow my brother Doug will be seeing us, along with his wife Brenda and daughter Stephanie. Looking forward to seeing them. It's been more than a year since I saw him. It's time....

Leaving on a jet plane

Just about to leave house. See you soon.

Very foggy trip to airport. Plane was on schedule. Everything worked out fine. I did wear the surgical mask on the plane. I figured that I now have something in common with Michael Jackson, we both wear masks in public! It was a small lear type jet, only 18 rows and I was seated in the 17th row by myself.

Eileen was at the gate to pick me up. What a treat to get a hug in person. Then we went to see my niece and her son at their new home. It had been awhile since I had seen them. It was great seeing them.

We then headed to the Cape. What a treat to go over the Bourne Bridge. Got to see the campground that we will be staying at beneath the bridge.

When we arrived at my parent's house, they were outside with camera waiting to take their first picture of me. Great moment to see and be with them. We then went out for SEAFOOD at my favorite restaurant Golden Boy. Had fried shrimp. What a treat. Life is good. Then Mom, Eileen and I went downtown to walk the main street area. Lots of tourists, but I didn't see any other females bald. I was a unique person there.

Have already done so much today in such a short time. Only thing I didn't do was take a nap. No time for that.

Dinner was at another favorite Bobby Byrne's. So much food that I had no room for Par tee Freeze icecream. That will have to wait until tomorrow.

As we were coming into the house the phone was ringing. Don and Bonnie from Phoenix (previously my parent's backdoor neighbors) called to say hi. That was another treat in a treat filled day. I think I made Bonnie jealous or at least made her think of Old Cape Cod.

Am wondering if different environment will change the way I sleep. Usually I have night sweats (Barry also) and wake up with soaked head. Time will tell. A long but great day on the Cape.

It's almost time

All I have to say right now is "night sweats" are the pits. Thought it was my hormones, but Barry has same problem. Wake up with head and pillow wet. Maybe good ole' Cape Cod air will fix that problem!

Off to work my last 8 hrs. before my vacation. See you later.

Done. Ready for vacation. And I can truly say that I need this vacation!

Just a couple of last minute organizing to do and I'm all set. Have already printed boarding pass so that will save time at airport.

Won't be on my blog in a.m. as I'm heading out the door very early.

As my sister says, ADIOS AMICOS.

Happy 4th of July

Woke up again early this a.m. with a wicked headache. Took some excedrin and sudafed just to cover all bases. Within 45 minutes the headache was gone. Both of us keep having "night" sweats. Wake up with our heads all wet along with pillows. Looking forward to a good night's sleep without any wakeups.

Ben slept over last night. The kids had a great time at the fireworks. Then they came home and had their own celebration in back yard. More to come this evening.

I work tomorrow and then I'm off to Cape Cod on Wednesday. I will continue to blog and have access to my email. Usually I'll be at someone's house with a computer. May be a day or so I won't blog. But then I will catch everyone up on my activities.

Barry's aches are continuing longer than the past cycles. Spent some time in bed today. Had an afternoon treat of Dutch Isle. I cooked some chicken on the grill for dinner.

Our evening was very nice. The boys did a fireworks display again. Tim had faith that Barry would participate and it happened.

Sunday. A great week to follow

We went to church this a.m. and sat with Michele. It was perfect timing as we arrived the same time as her. It was nice sitting with her. She did recommend that I wear a surgical mask on the plane due to the usual germs associated with flying. I will check with the Cancer Center on Tuesday when I go for my procrit shot. Good idea. Had it not been for cancer, I would never have met her. She's quite a special lady. After church she took the time to show me how to put on a real scarf, rather than just my usual bandana. When I got home I tried it myself and it worked!

Made breakfast for Barry. And since it was another beautiful day outside, I layed down on lounge chair for awhile. Eventually we went over to Ohio for some shopping. Got Tim some new soccer cleats for school. And of course the best part was eating out at a restaurant. Barry was still achy but he's more of a trouper than I am, he pushed himself to get out and do something. I'm the hibernating type of person when I don't feel good. He didn't sleep well last night. Did rest some after we got back from shopping.

Tim got invited to go see local fireworks with Karyann. This worked out perfectly. I found out today that bugs like bald heads. Kept having them land on me while I was outside. And it looks like my pimples could be returning at the same time of my last cycle. But I have cream still to use.

I think you look awesome!

Woke up during the night with another bad headache. Took some excedrin and went back to bed. My arm was so sore yesterday, even with sling. The day before was easier because all I did was sit in chair with Barry. This weekend I'm really going to pamper it.

Barry did finally sleep last night. For about 6 hrs. And then just layed in bed.

Today it's such a beautiful day. Humidity is much lower along with temps. Have been loading a few things into trailer for next week's vacation. Next week we will all be on Cape Cod.

Tim finally went golfing for his first time today. He went with the Hoppes and had such a great time. Had been wanting to golf for quite awhile since taking lessons couple of years ago. Now he's hooked and hopefully this will turn into a more routine event. Came back with such a great smile on his face.

I also had a pretty good day. The best part of the day was while shopping at local grocery store. For some reason, that's where I seem to get the nicest comments. A woman perhaps in her 30s came up to me today and simply said "I think you look awesome!". I can't remember exactly what I said, something like it wasn't my chosing and that you have to be comfortable in your own skin. And there was an understanding without any more words. Heck, even when I had hair no one ever had said those words to me. What can I say, nice people out in this world when you need them.

I took a nap while Tim golfed since my arm has been quite sore. It did help some. Will take awhile for the discomfort to subside. And praying that I don't have same problem on the other arm.

Tim's outside lighting off some firecrackers now. We went out last night at about 11 p.m. to buy some for the 4th. Barry's been non stop most of the day. He doesn't give in the aches like I do. He's much stronger than I.

Looking forward to church tomorrow as I'm going to look for Michele who I spoke to last night. And maybe we'll sit with she and her family.

A Long Weekend and Finally a Holiday to Enjoy

Forgot to mention that Barry was able to sleep some yesterday. I'm his magic sleeping pill! Was glad to hear a few snores here and there. Went out at lunch and brought back panera for him.

It's Friday and it's been a long week. Am even taking a pillow to work to rest during lunch in a 2 seater chair that has been put in foyer leading to bathroom. You see, angels work silently at work too. Red, white and blue day at work so am going to wear my new Angels walk among us shirt from American Cancer Society.

Barry went to bed at about 4:30 a.m. only to just lay there. As I said, drugs.

I telephoned Michele R. during my lunch today. She got good news from her surgery on Tuesday. Clear margin on tumor that was removed and lymph nodes are negative! I gave her Dr. Garrow's phone number to conect with for oncologist. Again, good news for her.

During lunch I took my pillow and rested on my new chair. Felt so good and relaxin to do so. Even bought a new travel size pillow to keep in my desk for future use. Going to bring in some oil to fix the squeaking noise in door leading to room. That was a bit annoying. Wonder what people thought as they saw me resting. Probably wanting to nap with me!

This evening I finally connected with Michele W. from the next town. She goes to our church and I met her at a relay walk awhile ago. I talked with her as if I had known her for a long time. Very nice person to talk to. Only 33 years old and has just finished her 6 session of chemo. Radiation will follow. She's going to teach me how to do scarves after church this week. She always looks so nice. Another angel, what can I say.

Barry goes for 3rd chemo

Will be leaving shortly for Barry's 3rd chemo. More to follow.

Happy Anniversary to one of my bloggin' buddies. 14 years from what I remember. Keep em coming.

We were at the Cancer Center from 8:30 a.m. until 3:30 p.m. A long day for both of us. When I got home I couldn't wait to get into my jammies. Barry on the other hand went to work like a real man should! I don't know how he does it. And tonight he will not sleep due to the steroid. He'll be "speed man" or the energizer bunny. Tomorrow he'll go for his neulasta shot. By Saturday the aches will set in.

Yes, it was the 3rd treatment. Probably won't be the last one. In 3 weeks he will repeat the scans that he had done in April. This will determine if the tumor has changed in size. All our prayers are focused on positive outcome of these tests.

Dr.'s Visit today

Will post more later this p.m.

I didn't go to work today. Instead I saw the oncologist for him to look at my arm.
The main vein that was used for the first 2 chemos is irritated, that's why I'm having the pain. It may get worse before it gets better. Need to take anti inflammtory pills. I also had him check out a cough that I seemed to have inherited yesterday. He has prescribed a 5 day antibiotic for me. It's very easy for someone to get sick from others when their own immune systems are out of whack due to chemo.
I need to be in top shape for my vacation next week. So once again, I took control of the situation and went to see doctor. Also mentioned that I didn't get period this month, you guessed it: chemo and the fact that I'm so tired by noontime: chemo. Said to take naps during the day to rest up. Will be this way for a few weeks. At least I know what to expect. Did take 2 naps during the day, and was actually able to dream during one of them. That's a good sign of a good sleep.

I spoke to my friend Michele who had breast surgery yesterday. She is listening to my words of wisdom and taking her percocet like a good girl! I also shared a secret that someone told me: wear shirts inside out for comfort where incision took place. And she is doing that too. Would have liked to visit with her today but need to focus on myself right now.

Tim went to band rehearsal and was brought home by another friend of ours BJ. She offered to have Tim go to their house tomorrow while we are at the Cancer Center. So this will work out quite fine. Will send him with swimsuit in case the town pool calls for him. He does enjoy swimming.

Am using a sling for my arm. That is making it easier for me. Keeps it in a good position. Still hurts but as they say: doable.

Barry's chemo is in a.m. so I won't be online until evening. Asking for positive vibes and strong veins as he "tries" to catch up to me on my 3rd round of chemo.

A friend follows in my steps today

Michele R. is having surgery this a.m. for her breast cancer. Am asking everyone to pray for her as she goes through a similar experience that I've been through. She's a positive person like me, so I know she'll do just fine! Will stop by her house after work today to check her out.

Headache has returned. Time for excedrin.

Barry has tooth extracted today. Also keep him in your prayers.

This cycle seems to be wearing me down more than the others. But probably doesn't help that my counts were low, and that procrit doesn't kick in for about a month. Just very tired, mentally and physically. I seem to cry very easily. Heck, could it be the stress?! Boy, I can not wait for next week when I get away to visit the family in Cape Cod. A dream come true.

My right arm is very tender/sore. It was a bit sore last week and that's why they used the other arm for chemo. It's the side that my lymph nodes were removed from so I'm a bit concerned. It hurts at the bend. No swelling in fingers. I did what I never thought I would ever do. I actually called my oncologist who is my neighbor just to ask him about this. You have to worry about lymphedemia (not sure of spelling) when you've had surgery I had. He said just what Maureen had said. As long as no swelling/numbness, just take percocet and if still sore in a.m. call for an appt. I felt bad calling him at home but it was something I needed to do. A very nice and comforting man to talk to.

I spoke to Michele R. this evening. She had a very long day with her procedures today. She was also ready with her pain killer. I know somewhat of the pain she is experiencing. It's not a fun thing to go through. I dropped off a book for her that has daily inspirational readings in it, along with an angel medalion called HOPE. This was the same medalion that someone gave me when I started my journey. It is with me always to keep me going.

A new week

Still have remnants of headache, but hopefully that will go away soon. From past experience, it will linger throughtout the day.

I'm headed to work. Short work week since I'm off Thursday for Barry's 3rd chemo.

I've been asked when my last chemo is. It is July 14th if all goes well. Have heard from a "bosum buddy" of mine, who has been through this, that by the time that day comes you are so tired it's even hard to imagine doing that last treatment. And from the way I am feeling now, I know what she means. I had the headache up until about lunch time. Am glad it's history now. These past days are so mentally tiring. But tomorrow is another day.

A neulasta day

As they say, better late than never. Finally am posting something for the day.

I did accomplish this: changed bed sheets this weekend for all!

Took all my energy to go to grocery store with Tim to get some much needed items. Have been drinking lots of OJ and we decided to buy some ice cream to save trips to Dutch Isle in this heat. As we were coming out of Giant Eagle, there was a stand set up for Par for the Cure, a fundraiser for cancer. The woman came up to me, and of course just by looking at me, knew what I was going through. Bald head and little energy today made me an easy target today. She hugged me and gave me a bracelet for the cause. Again, more tears were shed. I'm so glad that I have only one more of these chemo treatments to go through. The weekend following the treatment is no barrel of laughs. But I do know that tomorrow will be a brand new day.

Even in this heat, Tim played some soccer with his buddies and went to a strawberry social at a friend's church afterwards. It was not the kind of day for me to go outside. I was out just long enough to water my hanging flower bags. Oh yes, some kind of critters eat and try to destroy them during the night. Wish I could catch them in the act.

Almost 9 p.m., and the headache is slightly there. Been a long weekend.

Day 3 following Chemo #3

Slept through until 5 a.m. for bathroom break, and then back to bed until 9ish. Just a mild headache that I'm going to attack with some excedrin and pepsi.

It's already 76 outside. So you know where I'll be most of the day. Inside where I have nice central a/c. Too hot for me.

I've just received an email from Julie who I met yesterday at the Relay. That is a blessing as she told me she was not a computer/email kind of person. A true new bosom buddy.

After picking Tim up from his sleepover, I finished cutting the lawn down by the creek. And then I could feel the neulasta kicking in. Tim heated up some pizza for me and I hit the bed. I rested for a couple of hours. It's hard to explain how my body is feeling. It's like having the flu, when your bones ache. Takes a lot of energy just to get up. The headache returned today and doesn't want to go away.
When I woke up, the only thing I had on my mind to do was to get some ice cream at Dutch Isle down the road. I grabbed Tim to ride with me. We also brought a cone home for Barry. It took all my strength just to stand at the counter to order the cone. But it sure did taste good. After eating the cone, I went back to bed until about 5ish.

I defrosted the spaghetti sauce and meatballs that Meg had made us awhile back. And that was our dinner tonight. Sure did come in handy on a down day for me. Very tasty. Thanks Meg.

I telephoned Michelle who goes to my church and is also going through treatment for breast cancer. I always see her in church (met her at a Relay walk a few weeks ago) and admire her strength, and how pretty she looks in her scarves! I need her to give me lessons. She has 2 young children and I'm sure it's quite difficult for her during these times. I'm lucky that Tim is a teenager. Her husband told me that she was resting. She just had her last chemo on Tuesday. I totally can understand that she is resting. Will try to reach her another time.

Day after Round 3 Jane

Am not surprised to wake up with headache this morning. Didn't sleep that well last night, probably due to caffeine in excedrin and pepsi. The arm I had IV in seemed heavy to me, so I rested it on pillow as I attempted to sleep.

Headache has improved but is still in back of eyes. Am not working today because I need to pamper this headache, not get any more stress. I've already gone for my two shots: neulasta (white blood cells) and procrit (red blood cells). It takes about 4 weeks for procrit to kick me up a notch as Emeril would say. I'll get procrit shots weekly for awhile.

Temps and humidity are going to be high today. Expecting to spend some quality rest time in my bed today. Just enjoy the air conditioner and feel better.

Went to lunch with Barry and Tim. Continued to drink my pepsi to be on the theme that caffeine will help with headache. Came home and slept for about 3 hrs. Yes, slept. Felt so good. Woke up at 5 p.m. and had on my mind that there was another Relay for Life Cancer Walk in nearby town. Got my butt in truck and got there 15 mins. before showtime. This will make my 4th survivor walk, and every one gives me more angels in my life. Am so truly blessed. A woman came up to me and asked if I had anyone to walk with. Said no and she offered to walk with me. She was 14 months breast cancer survivor, Julie from Ohio. And do you know that when I was getting my shots at center this a.m. I got to talking with a woman getting chemo. Julie knows that woman who is also from Ohio. Such a small world. Incredible coincidence. While at the walk I noticed people wearing a shirt that said "Angels walk among us" by the American Cancer Relay for Life. I was able to track down 1 of these shirts which will fit Tim. And the Chairperson of this event gave me local ACS telephone # to call for another shirt for myself. This is how I feel. Angels are around me constantly.

Tim was able to enjoy the town pool while Barry and I rested. He is now sleeping over at a friend's house.

All in all, a great day. No complaints on my end.

Neulasta should kick in sometime tomorrow. Temporary pain/discomfort that I can live with.

Hope everyone else also had a good day.

Round 3 of Chemo done for Jane: 75% done!

And as my sister Maureen wrote last night, our computer was down and I felt so lost without it. There was a problem with the modem, outdated and so Adelphia replaced it for us this a.m.

I went to chemo this morning by myself. You see, I am a big girl.

Will post all about it later. Right now I have headache but wanted everyone to know that I'm OK. One more chemo to go. Just need to lie down and rest my brain. Lots of things going on in my head right now.

Today has been a very emotional day for me. Have shed some tears. Perhaps combination of PMS and just going through this whole chemo experience. Very tiring process.

My appointment with Dr. Garrow went very well. He is so comforting to talk to. Due to my hemoglobin and hermatocrit levels in my blood work, I will be getting Procrit shots weekly for awhile. This will boost them up. This medicine does not work quickly. This is probably the reason I've been tired lately. Yesterday at work I was yawning as I was talking to someone on the line. Now I know why. I did mention to the Dr. that my right lower arm was a bit sore (the IV arm for past 2 treatments) so today I used the other arm for IV. You can not fool around with veins with any chemo treatment. The medicines used are so powerful that the veins have to be just as powerful. We also decided to stick with same anti nausea drugs, even though one of them may be the cause of my headaches. I did not want to gamble, and risk getting sick from the chemo. I also asked if I should be following up with my gynecoligist for pap smear/mammogram. He said not to at this time as the chemo would not show accurate results on pap smear. Wait until this is over. After my appt., I had to wait almost 2 hrs. for the chemo treatment to begin. This was a very tiring and stressful time for me. Just the wait and anticipation produced a headache before I even had the chemo. And the headache has continued to now.

After the chemo, I went home. Of course, I couldn't wait to pee. And of course, it was the usual red pee. Good old adriamycin (chemo). Barry, Tim and I went to local restaurant Mugsies and used a gift certificate we had received from Michelle S. a friend of ours. It was nice to enjoy the lunch together as a family. I already have the chemo mouth taste, so dry. Took some excedrin with Moutain Dew and rested for awhile. With all this caffeine I didn't sleep. Another friend Michelle (recently diagnosed with breast cancer) stopped by with a gift from a woman I met at her house last night, Sonya. She sent me a Christian CD from Michael Smith. Sonya told her that I inspired her from our brief conversation last night. Incredible friends.

Tim went to movies with some friends. I did a shopping errand and cut the back lawn while he was gone. He had already done the front yard. Stopped for some take out food on the way home.

It's now 10 p.m. and time to put my head to rest. I am so glad I have this way to vent my bad and good days. Today is a combination of both, bad emotional time but good in knowing that I have only 1 chemo to go and many friends right beside me.

Blood test today for chemo #3

As Barry told me before his last blood test: I really studied hard for the test and know I will pass! I'll go before lunch today for the test.

Angels

Blood test tomorrow in preparation for 3rd chemo on Thursday. And then I only have 1 treatment left. Yeah.

A much better day at work today. Even though we were one person short, for some reason it was a better day for me. One thing that truly made my day was when the woman in charge of our center stopped by my desk and gave me a beautiful plant. It was a ceramic angel with a pot attached to it with all kinds of green plants in it.
Quite heavy also. She was given it by two other ladies, and thought it would make a nice gift for me considering all that I'm going through. Boy, what a nice lady. She's a pleasure to work for. I have so many angels in my life.

Tim and I went to pick up a couple of items at grocery store this evening. I was approached by a woman I did not know who quietly said to me "It grows back." I was bald as can be, no head covering. Of course, she was talking about my hair. She had cancer eight years ago and had gone through chemo. She knew what I was going through. I thanked her for her nice comment and for taking the time to even talk to me. Another angel put in my life.

Barry's tooth is less painful today. He will be on antibiotics until it is pulled next week. He will be having blood work done beforehand just to make sure his counts are OK for his turn at chemo next week. Just a necessary precaution.

Been a little over a week, and my pimples on my head are disappearing. No pustuoles are showing, and where there were some they are drying up nicely. Am very thankful for that.

So with all this happening to me today, my life is pretty good!

Barry finally got dentist appt. for late this afternoon. End result: has to have the tooth extracted by oral surgeon next Tuesday. Was given antibiotic. Infection under the crown, where at one time a root canal was done. Doesn't need this added discomfort. And infection probably came due to chemo and immunity system not working as well as normal. Has to wait this long due to being on chemo and need for antibiotics to work beforehand. All in coordination with chemo.

Another busy date at work. What else is new? I guess that's job security. All I do is fix other people's errors most of the day. How exciting.

Tim was able to spend the afternoon at the pool. Got some nice color on his face. That was only place he didn't lotion up. Gone for a bike ride into town now.

I had a new dining creation this evening. Lisa made us ham loaf. I had never heard of that dish. And I must say it was delicious. All our angel meals have been so tasty and deeply appreciated.

I've been given permission to share my friend's name on my blog. It is Michelle R. (David P's mom.) She lives in same town as us. Have only known her since moving to Pennsylvania but can tell from recent conversations that I've had with her that she's going to do just fine. She also has a son the same age as my son. A lot for a kid to go through but these boys will be stronger in the long run. She will be having surgery soon. And now I can be there for her as others were there for me.

Happy Father's Day!

We got up and went to 8 a.m. mass. This past week I wrote a letter to the church and explained our current health conditions. I told the priest that we are on so many prayer lists, but had never contacted our own church. I asked that we be put on our own list. We were very pleased to see that in the bulletin that our names were mentioned. Afterwards, Barry whined for some bacon and eggs. And since it is Father's Day, I gave in to him and cooked some for the family.
Don't want to see a grown man cry.

Again, nothing planned for the day. I love Sundays because I love my afternoon naps. It is of course a day of rest.

Barry's had a bad tooth ache since Friday. Been in a lot of pain since then. Hopefully will get in to see dentist first thing Monday morning. With everything going on in our lives we don't need that pain.

This past week I learned that a friend of mine has also just been diagnosed with breast cancer. Every day someone new is touched with this dreaded disease. And since it seems to be so common, it's almost not even a shock anymore. And this is sad. This woman, who I will not mention by name for her privacy, will be starting her journey next week when she consults with a surgeon. I have told her that the waiting for results of pathology reports is very difficult. But I have also told her that I'm right here for her, just a step or two ahead of her. I know in my heart that she will do fine and beat it, and that's because I know she has the faith that is needed to do so. I've been where she is but it will get better.

As planned, I took a mini nap today. Took Tim to local mall to buy new video game for our vacation. Later on in the day, Tim went to the town pool for a couple of hours. He and his friend's family closed it up at 8 p.m. A bit cool but he still enjoyed himself.

Ahhh, it's Saturday

Barry's working this morning and I just rolled out of bed at 9:30 a.m. Felt good just to stay in bed. Slept better last night. Still have the end of the pimples, but do think they are disappearing. Not getting worse at least.

I have nothing planned for the day but to rest. Can't believe my 3rd treatment is less than a week away.

It was a quiet but nice day. Took a nap in afternoon. Went to bed with headache and woke up with one. Not a bad one though. For relief I had some caffeine soda with excedrin. Seemed to work. The boys continued to do lawn work as I cooked spare ribs on the grill.

Another week closer to the end of chemo

Tossed and turned again last night but will go to work. At least I know I have a script for another antibiotic on hand. Hopefully by end of day I'll see improvement, right now I don't see any.

After work I got the oral antibiotic script filled and took one of the pills. I do think the pimples have improved. Not as many pustuoles. I think that's the correct word. Not as red either. Am thankful for that.

We went out to the Chinese buffet for dinner. Pretty good food. Really enjoyed the butter shrimp they had. And then we all did lawn work.

I got my new vacuum today. I'll just tell Barry on Sunday that it's his Father's Day present! Our old one was quite old and needed to be replaced. This one sure does suck. Should see all the debris. Eileen and Maureen, you would be proud of me.
Actually doing some housework.

Can you believe that Bill Clinton took time away from Monica to post on my blog today. That's truly a good friend. I never know who will post next. Keeps me guessing and on my toes.

When I go to the Cape next month, I'm planning on a trip to Nantucket with my sister. This will give me a chance to see my friend Mary Lou who I've known for an eternity. She's another one of my bloggin' friends. This will give us a chance to see the old island. Haven't been there in years. They have a hi-speed ferry which is quite nice to take over.

Not working today- AKA Pimple Head

I was up at 3 a.m. with such a sore head from the pimples. I ended up taking a percocet and figured then that I would probably not go to work today. I thought it best to see the doctor again today as a follow up to my appointment the other day. I want an opinion from an expert on the condition/status of these pimples. I can be sitting and at the same time I am aware of the pain in the area that they are clustered. Almost as if they were alive. Strange.

My appointment is this afternoon. And since I'm not at work, I truly can do the best thing and just expose my head to fresh air rather than cover it. Considering everything I'm going through, I haven't used much time since going through chemo.
Days of chemo and days following chemo. Not bad. And if I get different drug next time for anti nausea, that may take the head aches away so I can work the following day.

Saw nurse practitioner this p.m. Said this is not a common side effect. Inflammation/irritation of hair follicles. If it's not better in couple of days, she has written up a prescription for an oral antibiotic for me.

Tim went and saw Batman movie today with his buddies. Said it was a good movie. 2 hrs. long.

Our dinner tonight was brought over by Sally, Tim's English teacher. She used to watch over Tim during her class after she knew what we were going through. A guardian angel. The dessert was provided by Tawnee, a mother of one of Tim's classmates/fellow bandmember. Everyone's generosity is truly amazing and deeply appreciated. It's hard to express in words exactly how I feel.

Just call me zit head

Didn't sleep well last night due to sore head from pimples. But at least am on medication cream for first whole day today. Not an attractive site on top of my head.

Wore my bandana like yesterday, 1/2 the day. Felt it was more important to allow fresh air to it than to worry about how I looked. Somehow, God gives you the strength that you never knew you had.

When I got home, Tim told me that someone was stopping by with some dinner for us. An unexpected surprise. It was one of our neighbors who had heard about us. Every day I meet an angel of some kind. It amazes me to the point of just shedding some tears in appreciation of their kindness. They are not bad tears, but tears of love.

Thanks.

Had my alarm set for p.m. instead of a.m. so am running a bit late. Will post more after work. Must have been sleeping good to not be looking at clock like I usually do.

The pimples seemed to be growing wild on my head so I called the cancer center. They eventually had me go in to see the nurse practitioner Debbie in the afternoon. She examined my head and prescribed bactriban as an anibiotic. Also agreed that not covering it is good medicine. And I did take the bandana that I was wearing to work off at lunchtime. Thank goodness I'm not vain and need to be perfect in the looks dept.! The way I look at it, it's not my chosing to look the way I am and I'm not going to be embarassed about it.


While I was talking to Debbie, I mentioned the headaches that I had after treatment. She said that one of the anti nausea meds, kytrol, can cause headaches. She said that at the next treatment I could be given another equivalent drug. I just said that it better be as good because I have not been sick yet. She also had some blood drawn to do a CBC since I'm mid-cycle for this treatment. By the time I left the center, she had consulted with Dr. Garrow about my headaches. He has made notes about it for the next cycle.

Another week

Barry will be going strawberry picking with Tim this morning. Their annual trip to the Amish farm. Can't wait to see how good they are this year.

I've started to get the pimples back on my scalp. Last time I thought they were the sign that hair was coming out. Now I've heard it's just because of chemo.

Off to work.

Barry and Tim picked 6 quarts of strawberries in what Tim tells me was 15 minutes! And they are beauties. Smashed some, froze some and the rest I dipped in chocolate.
So good.

Tim got his own pool membership today. After we ate our delicious meatloaf, he went for a couple of hours to the pool. I think that's one of our better investments for the summer. He met a few of his friends down there and really enjoyed himself.

And my scalp is sore from the pimples. Mostly on the part where my cowlick would be.
Going to call doctor in a.m. to see if I can put anything beside cortisone on it. Am thinking that it's perhaps better not to cover it, but then it's not that attractive. I may just say the heck with it and go hatless for a while at work tomorrow.

Barry's turn with Neulasta

The neulasta is right on schedule. Barry's in bed now feeling the many aches in his body from the shot on Friday. Only thing you have to think is this: it's doing what it's supposed to be, and tomorrow it will be history. A couple of years ago this drug wasn't even used. I think his aches are much stronger than mine. Worst thing for me was the headache, but I'm ready now. I have bought excedrin since it has caffeine in it which people say is what you need.

Another nice day here. Spent most of it inside. Was able to take a small nap.
Then Tim went to play soccer with some of his friends. All in all, a day of rest for me. And why not, it is Sunday a day of rest.

Saw sign this weekend that strawberries are ready to be picked. That means Barry and Tim will be picking lots of berries this week. Mmmmmm. They were running about 3 weeks late we heard.

And Maureen, had I gone topless for real... I think I would have definitely been banned from the pool! Or else scared everyone and had the pool to myself. Geez, that's an idea..

Cooked both days on the grill this weekend. Steak yesterday and chicken today. And dad, I cooked it just right. A little burnt around the edges. Made some homemade potato salad to go with it. I also want to thank my food angels this week: Kelly, Jan and Carol a neighbor of mine. We certainly have wonderful people in our lives. Thanks.

A pretty nice day in Pennsyvlania

Barry got up earlier than me, I stayed in bed until 9. Going to try to get my scooter inspected today and then head over to another Relay for Life walk that the Bank is participating in. Just going to walk a few laps for the cause.

I walked for about 1/2 hr. at the Reley, came home and washed my scooter (which I couldn't get inspected) and my truck. Now Tim and I are headed to town pool. I might even go topless! (bald) Very hot and humid today.

Well, Tim and I did spend a couple of hours at the pool. And with Tim's support he told me to go topless, shed the hat and go in the pool for nice cool dip. So, of course I listened to my smart kid. And afterwards, I did some sunning (with suntan lotion. I didn't burn so I must have used just the right amount of lotion. It felt so good just being there and getting cooled down. A perfect time.

We had ice cream at Dutch Isle today. Even Barry had a cone in the evening.

All in all, a pretty nice day in Pennsylvania.

PS. Just got off web cam with Donna C. from Long Island. The wonders of technology!
Pretty cool invention.

TGIF

Don't think Barry slept at all last night. Effects of one of the anti nausea drugs. will be pooped later today. Tim's last day of school and I have early meeting this a.m. Talk later.

When I got up this morning at 6, Barry was vacuuming kitchen floor in preparation for cleaning it. Hadn't slept a wink. And by the time I got home today, the cleaning had continued throughout the house. The effects of the drug just keep on going. Now I truly know how bad a cleaner I am! Anyone want to rent him after his next chemo? Does a great job. It's now 10 p.m. and he basically hasn't slept since waking yesterday morning. But am definitely sure this weekend he will catch some z's. He did go for his neulasta shot this p.m. to build up his white blood cells.

Can't believe how fast this week went. Pufff and it's Friday. Pufff and the school year has ended and Tim's in high school. Time goes by too fast.

Round 2 of chemo for Barry

Barry has an early appt. this morning for Round 2. I'm going to join him for lunch and bring him a Panera sandwich. Am taking an extra 1/2 hr. for lunch. I went with him for his first chemo but it really took a lot out of me mentally due to being so close to my own treatment. I'm only a phone call away from him. I won't be there physically but will be there in spirit like all our bloggin' family and friends.

I did eat Panera with Barry today. It truly is not the best place to have lunch, but I thought it was important to spend that time with him. He was there a long 6 1/2 hours for treatment today. That is a long time for him. So much longer than my couple of hours. He said he didn't rest as much as when I was there on his first treatment. He did enjoy the time I spent with him and of course the sandwich. I think next treatment I will go with him. It's one of those things that I don't know if there is a right answer. I didn't go with him and I was double guessing myself while I wasn't there. Will have to talk it over with him.

He met with his doctor before the chemo. He will have a scan done after the 3rd chemo to see if nodules/cancer area have changed in size. If smaller, he will continue on with more chemo. If larger, a more aggressive chemo drug will be given to him. So we are praying for a positive scan at that time. Going through chemo is something that no one should have to go through.

Barry, you did great today!

Barry's blood work

Barry goes for his blood test today in preparation for his 2nd chemo treatment tomorrow morning. I'm not going with him as it was very tiring for me last time. Plus he sleeps which makes the time go fast for him, but not for me. If he should need anything, I'm just down the road. Will visit him at lunch time.

Barry did his blood test and results are perfect for Round 2 of chemo tomorrow.

Each day does get better

Slept a little better last night. Had trouble early on since I felt like I was getting a cold, nasal drip and such. Got up and took some sudafed and it doesn't appear to be a problem today. Will keep an eye on it as I don't need to get sick.

It was a much better day today, just not having a headache is a blessing.

And you can tell by my short blog, that life is OK right now.

Tim went to town pool again today. I think it's time for him to get his own membership. He really enjoys swimming.

I'm pretty excited that I will be able to go to the Cape in July for a short but well needed vacation. Barry and Tim will also be going. I will fly there and they will take the camper there. We'll be going at different times, but overlapping on the weekend. This was unexpected. This way we can see both families in between chemo treatments. I can't wait! I'll be returning just in time for my LAST treatment.

A new week

I have just a smidge of a headache left right now. Was up and down most of the night, but that could mean a good night's sleep tonight.

The headache is finally gone. Shhhhhh. Don't want it to come back.

Just a short blog today. A tiring day for me. But I do know that it will get better in a couple of days.

Thanks for all your nice comments.

Neulasta kicks in

Am going through growing pains now. Started during the night. Barry tells me to get out of my cave (bedroom) but that's where I'm most comfortable. Nice and dark.
Temps in high 80s outside so I'm not going there. Back to bed now. Not going to accomplish much today but that's OK. Just wish I could get rid of headache that I've had past couple of days.

I want to thank Jody for bringing over a casserole dish. It at least got me dressed and out of my room. And it was tasty. She came when I most needed a hug. She's been through what I am going through. This weekend is just one of those sucky weekends. No other way to describe it. Just have to get over the next couple of days and it will get better.

Day 3 following Chemo

Slept better last night. We both were in bed by 9 p.m. Still have the mild headache that I am babying because I don't want it to get worse. No effects of neulasta, but am anticipating it.

Tim has some kind of band outing today. Think Barry will bring him to school for that, I intend to stay put but that could change. Hard to plan on doing something when you know what could be coming as far as possible aches.

No energy today. Did manage to make scalloped potato with ham just now. (box mix) My contribution for the day. Headache continues.

It's now 8 p.m. and I still have headache in back of head. There all day. No signs of neulasta, not that I'm complaining. Just wondering if and when it's going to come. Spent most of the day in bed, not sleeping at all, just with eyes shut to relax.

Nite all.

These pictures are taken by our son Tim, who continues to be our daily inspiration. 

Biker Dude Barry (no moustache) 

We are Survivors! Jane and Barry. Jane's second day of round 2 of chemo. 

Day after Round 2 Jane

Am not going to work today. Still have headache and was unable to sleep AT ALL last night. That's side effect of the anti-nausea drug decadron. Literally watched each hour go by on my clock. Got Tim on the bus and heading back to bed with new meds.

Have an appt. at cancer center this a.m. and will also get my neulasta shot. And this will cause the flu-like symptoms throughout the weekend. At least I know what to expect. Even though I don't feel up to par now I do realize I have a lot of friends looking out for me and wanting to know how I feel. That's why I post anyway.

Continue to have slight headache during the day. Am trying to not have it get any worse. Am taking percocet for it. This morning Barry asked me to cut his hair. Wasn't on my to do list but I did it. Went very short but ended up shaving it all off due to blotchy areas that had already come out. He shaved the moustache first.
Had never seen him without one. So, Tim: we are officially coneheads. And the pictures that follow will prove it. Just not taken on couch like you spoke of.

Afterwards, we stopped by Barry's job to show his boss anc co-workers and then we went to the cancer center for appointment and for my neulasta shot.

Got home, ate a little lunch and got into bed for about 3 hours. Got up so I could see Tim's reaction to Barry's new "do". He said he looks like his father. Most other people say he looks younger. Either way, he even may consider keeping it like this after treatment. Could be like the St. Laurent boys in Az.! There was a reason we went to see them in February I guess.

Had nice visits with some Angels this week: Julie, Sue, Michelle and David. Again, thanks for being there.

Round 2 of chemo DONE: 50% complete

I continued to sleep well last night. Am thankful for that. My appt. is in 3 hours and 1 hour before I take my anti nausea drug Emend. I meet with oncologist before the actual chemo to go over my blood tests and to review how I'm doing. Barry is taking me to the appointment. Already it's 57 sunny degrees. After Tim gets on bus I may even sneek back into bed for a few minutes.

PS. Never did go back to bed.

I met with Dr. Garrow before my chemo. He did explain that the headache(s) that I had last cycle are chemo related and I should just take the strong stuff like percocet for relief. Tylenol doesn't cut it. All my other blood tests (liver, etc.) also came back perfect. Good news. I then went to my 2nd round of chemo. The adriamycin takes about 15 minutes for Kendra the nurse to manually syringe it into the IV on my arm. Then the second drug is administered by IV drip for about 40 minutes. It's relatively a short period of time compared to Barry's treatment but is mentally draining for me. On the pillow beside my arm with the IV is my HOPE charm that Linda gave me. HOPE goes with me everywhere. While sitting with me, Barry was feeling his moustache and guess what: the hairs are coming out. This had been questionable as to whether he would or wouldn't lose it. He's had moustache since he's been about 18/19 years old. Will probably shave it tomorrow. Wanted to give the guys at work one last look at it! My good friend Jody told me this: "that every single hair gone signifies cancer cells GONE too!!!" A direct quote from her last night. As Barry and I left the center, we noticed our names on two Relay for Life tribute forms. Cindy C. was so kind to apparently donate monies for another ACS walk that is coming up. Thank you twice for both Barry and I. It did not go unnoticed.


After the chemo, we went to get some items at grocery store and then we went to a new Chinese buffet nearby. The food was delicious and inexpensive. I really enjoyed going out to lunch since we didn't do that the first time. A much needed treat. The only effect I was feeling after chemo was when I was shopping I started to sweat (under scarf). And now when I sweat, it's visible on top of my shiny head. Not hidden under any hair. Noticed that last night when I used hot tub for first time in awhile. On way home, the scarf was taken off quickly. I had wore a long sleeve shirt for treatment since room is often cool. I think being hot and the situation just worked against me to the point of making me feel like I was going to pass out. My sister attributed this to the drugs and not having any real food since early morning. Couldn't wait to go to bathroom (I tell it like it is, I'm truthful) where the urine comes out red (chemo drug) along with diarrhea. I immediately went to bed to crash. It was about 3 p.m.

Rested for a couple of hours and then cut up some ham for Tim's dinner. Boy, was I once again thankful for Angels on earth. I heated up some homemade chicken soup for the soul. The headache has started and I've already taken some percocet. Going to fight right back. My jammies feel so good and will head back to bed soon.

I go back to cancer center tomorrow for my neulasta shot in morning.

As I was resting, Sue who works with Barry stopped by to deliver a delicious jello creation made with whipped cream/pineapple/nuts. As they say, there is always room for jello and that was the perfect time. Heard her at the door and got up to say hi to her. Just another Angel in our lives. Headache continues but if that's all, can't really complain.

Blood work today

Am hoping today is calmer day at work. Enough stuff on my head as it is (or actually there isn't! bald you know!) I'm going for blood work at Cancer Center in preparation for round 2 of chemo tomorrow morning. For about 2 weeks I've been feeling practically normal and now I have to go through this again. A bit depressing to be truthful, but on the bright side I will be 1/2 way done chemo. It's just human nature I guess.

Have taken brush and hairdryer out of my bathroom. Now Tim has so much room in there. Don't need those items for awhile.

Just a quick update. I had blood work this a.m. and my white blood cells are PERFECT. That is good news. On to round 2 tomorrow.

I hope you all realize how much you mean to me. I've received so many well wishes lately that it truly warms my heart. Wishes from people that I've never even met but are now part of my life. I still don't understand, and I will not try to, how you can spend time with people on a daily basis and they don't all wish you good luck especially when going through chemo. I've never been that way so it's puzzling. But I guess that's the way some people are.

I wear my hats and new earrings to work daily. Love them both. When I get hot, I take the hat off and go au naturel. Doesn't bother me a bit. It's not my doing that I am this way so I will continue to shine (physically and mentally) in their presence.

Signing off for today. Already miss American Idol on TV.

I am turning into an official conehead. The stubs I used to have are disappearing and now it's the bald look.

Off to work with pink hat and parrot earrings. A good pair.

Today was first day of work after a software update. Therefore, you guessed it. A day from you know what. No lunch break and I worked 1/2 hr. extra just to get my desk cleaned up from my daily work. A very exhausting day. Sure do hope tomorrow is better as I need to be in good shape for Thursday's chemo.

Have spoken to Barry this evening and he is losing some hair on top of his head. Hoping it doesn't all come out. Otherwise, he's going to be my matching conehead.
Time will tell.

I go for blood work tomorrow in preparation for round 2 of chemo. Hope everything is OK to keep rolling.

Where there is faith

Where There Is Faith

I believe in faithfulness
I believe in giving of myself for someone else
I believe in peace and love
I believe in honesty and trust but it's not enough
For all that I believe may never change the way it is
Unless I believe Jesus lives

Where there is faith
There is a voice calling, "keep walking"
You're not alone in this world
Where there is faith
There is a peace like a child sleeping
Hope everlasting in He who is able to
Bear every Burden, to heal every hurt in my heart
It is a wonderful, powerful place
Where there is faith


The above are words from a Christian song I just heard by 4HIM. Wish you could actually hear the song.

I had to work about 5 hours this a.m. Nice way to spend holiday weekend. But was able to do some things today anyway like take a scooter ride, nap and then Barry, Tim and I went to see STAR WARS movie. Pretty good movie. Yes, finally we saw it. Tim's been saying no to all his friends when they have invited him. Wanted to see it with his dad. And we went to new movies with stadium seating. Really nice and roomy.

This weekend what stubby hair I have on my head is coming out. I have found a trick to getting off my scalp. Scotch tape! Don't laugh it works. And it beats it being sore on my scalp, especially when I lay down on it. Am even noticing my legs as having the same prickly feeling. Must be losing the shaved hair on my legs. Yeah, no shaving for a couple of months.

My 2nd chemo is this Thursday. Then I will be 50% done with chemo treatment. One way of looking at it. I'll be taking that day off from work. Past couple of weeks I've been feeling so good that for a moment I forgot what I was going through. But with chemo just a couple of days ago, it does come back to my mind. But at least I know what to expect. Plus, I won't have to worry about losing my hair.

Sunday: worked most of afternoon

The itching was not due to the wig. This a.m. it felt like porcupine, back of my neck. But when I further explored it, it was due to more hair coming out. Am so glad I shaved it already. Little stubs coming out of scalp.

After going to church, I cooked up some 'sghetti and meatballs that Angel Meg had sent over. Another delicious meal. Thank you.

After an early lunch I had to go to work due to a computer upgrade. Worked until 5 p.m. and have to go back early in morning. Some holiday. Would have rather spent the time with family.

For dinner we had hotdogs and hamburgers on the grill, and I made some shrimp pasta salad for the "boys" tomorrow while I'm at work. I expect to work the whole morning.

All in all, a pretty good day.

Tim had a Memorial Day concert to play at this a.m. Was going to be a parade, but changed to an indoor church service due to rain. Nice and sunny now though.

As Barry and I were leaving to go shopping (while Tim was away), we were pleasantly greeted by BJ who was bringing a huge assortment of Dunkin Donuts breakfast goodies. Enough to feed an army. With all these friends, how can you ever feel depressed for a long period of time?

Have spoken to my sister Maureen and she is hoping to be out of hospital this afternoon. Just needs to make sure she keeps meds down. So that is good news.

Since I "pigged" out on donuts, Tim motivated me to take bike ride with him. A little over 2 miles. Enough to get my heart pumping away. And now I deserve my nap!
Thank God for Tim.

Tim is at sleepover at friend's house. Barry and I went out to Chinese buffet. I wore my wig for first time. Told Barry he could think he was on date with another woman! Didn't wear anything under it and now I know what they mean by wigs being itchy. Only wore it in restaurant, not to and from. Just took benadryl to relieve the itch.

My sister Maureen is home from hospital. That's good news.

TGIF

We made it through another work week. Unfortuantely I have to work Sunday and Monday due to a bank update. Only a few hours each day, plus they give us another day off. Which of course will be used as a chemo day! Looks like a nice day so far.

Jeans day at work today so it's an even better day. As for my choice of hat, it's either going to be a Dow Jones cap or a FNB cap. Time will tell...

Thanks to all my buddies at DJ/WSJ last night. And to get another blogger comment makes me more happier than you know.

Heard from my brother in law that Maureen is staying overnite at hospital. Considerable pain. Will miss her bloggin' comments. Had hernia operation.

After dinner, Barry, Tim and I spred mulch out front. This was on our to do list since Mother's Day. Looks great. Really needed it. My oncologist, Dr. Garrow even stopped by for a quick hello. Liked my new "do". A wonderful neighbor to have. Afterwards I spoke to Maureen in the hospital. Quick conversation as the pain is still strong. Think she is need of some of our positive energy tonight.

I would like to thank this week's angels: The Clarks, Sherwoods and LeJeunes. And I have to say one thing: always heard that some of these folks couldn't cook. Well let me tell you this, they've not been telling the truth! Delicious meals made from the heart. Thank you so much. Still would like their recipes.

Bald is beautiful and to be bold is even better..

Since it's a bit cool this a.m., and I don't want to get sick, I think I'm going to "as Jody says" don the hat. And perhaps in my own department shed it and go bald.
I really love it. Didn't know what to do in the shower this a.m. with my head. So much time even after getting out of it. Well, off to early meeting at my job. Keep bloggin' everyone so that I know you are there.

PS. Sorry Bo didn't win American Idol, but he did win me.

Today at work was so cool. I had so many people come up to me and tell me how good I looked. Wore the hat to the meeting and took it off as I was going back to my department. A bold statement on my part. And the only time I put the hat back on was when I got cold. Actually had to get some hot chocolate. And when I got my nails done, I went au naturel and while doing some errands in town. Taking control and feeling good about it.

Am off to Barry's job as they have been very supportive of us. I want to show off my new GI Jane look.

PSS. I have gotten so many emails and blog comments today. You guys are great.

Wishing my sister Maureen (a good blogger) success with her surgery tomorrow. She's one of us and I know she'll do fine.

Retta and me. The background sign actually says STYLE. And do you realize how liberating it is to have a shaved head. Well, it is and I am surviving!! 

I didn't ask for cancer, but I'm going to make the best of it.  

A new beginning, and done with a smile. 

I take control of the situation! and Retta helps me. God Bless friends. 

Angels on earth! Losing hair today but I took CONTROL

Lately when people past my desk at work, they check out to see what I am eating. Often I've had a snack (or two), also. I tell them what I'm eating and I also tell them that Angels deliver our family dinners three times a week. And then I explain the definition of Angel and friend. One in the same. And as you can see from a couple of comments that have been posting, others think that is a cool gesture. I have one suggestion, or should I say my husband does. It would be so nice to have the recipe included with the meal because all the food is so delicious. Again, thanks to our Angels.

Just moments ago, during my lunch, I went to scratch my head and hair came out. I know I've been expecting this to happen and making fun of it, but it is a bit upsetting right now to me. Have just called my hairdresser and she will shave my head tomorrow after my scheduled nail appointment. Since this hair has been in my head for 49 years, I'm saving some pieces for a scrapbook!

Have decided to fight back once again. Going to get head shaved tonight. Not going to let the drugs do it, I'm taking control.

Got the head shaved and it is so liberating. Just what my other bosom buddy cancer survivors told me! Jody and Linda. Don't know why but it is. Just something magical that happens to us. Retta is my hairdresser and she was wonderful to me. I took pictures as I got it shaved and will post them soon. Watching American Idol and hoping Bo wins.

I must say it was a GREAT day!

Going to try one of my new scarves today. This way I won't try to itch my scalp. Nice bright red one. And I forgot, red earrings also.

As they say, it must be the time of the month (or should I say chemo cycle), but this past weekend and today are GREAT days for me. I feel so good and actually able to chuckle a bit at work today. So many people commented on my new scarf. Made me feel even better. Kept the scarf on all day and wasn't bothered by my scalp. When I talked to doctor's office and they confirmed it was part of losing the hair, I told them what my mother has told me: "all part of the aging process"! Yes, mom you're a smart one.

Short blog tonight. Have to get myself ready for Bo on American Idol.

Thanks for so many nice comments. Love them.

Itchy scalp

Barry's aches seemed to disappear at about 1 a.m. last night. Today is a good day for him.

I'm beginning to get some pimples in my scalp (which is also a bit itchy). Have been told this is the start of the hair coming out. Am prepared so bring it on. I know it will probably be a bit upsetting for me, but considering the whole scheme of things I can handle it.

By the time I got home from work, my scalp and even eye brows are itchy. Per nurse Maureen (my sister) I have taken some benadryl. As Tim said to me, this way you'll be glad when the hair comes out! Smart kid.

I got new hats/scarf in mail today which I ordered. Can't wait to wear them. A new me which is going to be different and better than the old one...

Barry feels the aches of Neulasta/chemo

Barry is now feeling the aches of neulasta/chemo. Sternum/shins/ankles. Has taken a pain pill and is feeling a bit better. Now he knows what day/s will be crummy for him. One side effect that has gone away is the tingly feeling in his fingers, that's from one of the chemo drugs.

Tim and I went out for awhile to do some shopping in Boardman. I turned around and he was sound asleep listening to his music. Don't know what made me think this, but I prayed that he continue to be strong during our treatments. And as I prayed I couldn't help but cry a bit. He's such a good and smart kid and I can't imagine what is going on in his head. No kid should have to go through such a thing. And believe me, I know of no book that is entitled "how to deal with your child when both parents have cancer." Going shopping broke up our day a bit, he was able to get some new shorts at Old Navy so he's quite content.

I've come to the conclusion that Tim's going to do just fine. How could he not, look at his parents! Just my last thoughts of the day.

This is me in my 2nd Relay for Life Cancer event. A beautiful day to meet wonderful friends. 

Me, Michelle and Jody: Smiling for a cause. 

Cancer survivors: 1 month to 5 years. 

A 7 year old cancer survivor!  

A great day at my 2nd Relay for Life event!

Believe it or not, I was in bed at 8:15 p.m. last night. And probably asleep within 10 minutes. A tiring week for me. I don't think there are many moments of the day/week that cancer is not on my mind. And even more so with Barry's diagnosis. So, for me to be able to sleep is a gift. I slept right through until 7:15 a.m.!! A record for me. No bathroom breaks even. And to finally dream once again was so nice. It's the type of sleep that when you wake up, you stretch your toes to the end of the bed and just feel so good. I didn't even hear Tim and his friend Jonathan last night.

Looks like another great day out there. Hope everyone enjoys it to the fullest.

I have changed today's title because I just got back from my 2nd Relay for Life event and it was so inspirational! The first one I went to in town had about 15 survivors, and this event had about 375 registered survivors. A much larger event and very moving. I am so thankful that Jody invited me to it, and for the opportunity to meet so many of her friends who are survivors.
Thanks Jody! I not only met her friends but I also recognized a lady who goes to my church. A face that I had seen a couple of times but was too shy to go up to. I noticed her once with a great scarf but didn't do anything about it. So today I took advantage of the situation and introduced myself to her. She is a young breast cancer survivor raising two young children. Her name is Michelle. I've said this before and I'll say it again, had I not been diagnosed with breast cancer I would never have met such great and inspirational people. Somehow it's all in God's hands, I truly believe that.

So many memories to enjoy and to go over in my mind from today. Barry continues to be good, considering it's his first weekend from receiving chemo. And thank God for that.

Just a great day.

Day after Chemo for Barry

I slept great last night for a change. Not even a bathroom break. Barry, on the other hand, had the side effects of lots of energy (one of the pre-meds) and therefore lots on his mind. And if that's the only side effect, he's doing fine.

Our friend Becky is creating a meal of love for us tonight. Has kept it a mystery and can't wait to see what it is. She's like me, a usual non-cooker of meals. Thanks again to all my friends.

I'll be off to work today and it's Barry's day off. He did work last night, and it was not an easy night. But a quality paper was produced which made him happy in the end.

Barry invited me to lunch which was a pleasant surprise. Always a treat to eat out. Afterwards, he went to cancer center for his neulasta (booster) shot. Hope he doesn't ache like I did last weekend.

You should see our lawn. Tim did the back yard this p.m., and Barry in my opinion, over did it in the woods area and creek area. He spent a good 4 hrs. weedwacking and such. Too much work and am sure he'll pay the price. Think he'll sleep fine tonight since he didn't sleep last night and he did lots today. End result, the lawn is in excellent shape.

June Cleaver/AKA Becky delivered our meal this evening. Yes, she does cook after all! And it was delicious, like all the other meals we've had. As I would tell my mother when I would visit the Cape, "have never had a bad meal yet."

Tim's got a friend sleeping over tonight. A good change for him. In morning he refs a game, and later in the day I am hoping to go to another Relay for Life cancer walk.

And now Barry's first chemo treatment

My husband Barry's first chemo treatment is today at 10 a.m. I will be going with him for support. His treatment will last a total of 4 hrs. It consists of a 4 hr. slow IV drip, unlike my chemo. It is so wonderful hearing from so many people about our journey. We certainly are not alone now. As a friend told me when I went to my first oncology appt., you will not be alone in the waiting room. Many people who love you will be beside you.

On more thing: slept so good last night. Only woke up once. Yeah.

We got to the appt. at 10 a.m., unfortunately they were running behind schedule due to people calling in sick. And since we did not know his pre-meds would take about 45 minutes to administer, just getting home at about 5:30 p.m. A very long and tiring day. Luckily Barry was able to sleep a portion of the time, but I wasn't able to do so. Barry did great! Tomorrow he goes for his neulasta shot and hopefully won't be as achy as I was last weekend. I did drop Barry off at his job for a few hours to do some paperwork and will pick him up earlier if needed.

That's it for today. A bit tired to write anymore right now. Going to lie down a bit, Tim outside cutting the lawn.

PS. I spoke to social worker today at the Center. She contacted Karen, the woman I met at the Look Good program and has told her that I would like her telephone number. When I got home today, there was a message from Karen giving me her work and home phone number. Can't wait to talk to her. Not sure how many weeks her treatment is ahead of mine.

PSS. I called Karen and spoke to her. Having cancer has given me another friend in this world. How lucky can I be? She will be doing her 2nd chemo treatment tomorrow, therefore is a couple of weeks ahead of me. She's had no side effects so far. It was great being able to talk to her and I'm sure we will keep in touch. A wonderful spirit.

Meals of love and new bloggers

Couldn't get into bed fast enough last night. Had good time at program, but during the p.m. at work I was feeling as if I was losing steam. Sort of a stiff neck coming, a lot of burping and a feeling of lump in my throat as I swallowed. So wished I could just lie down somewhere but I was at work. My sister told me to take tums and to speak to doctor about it. I'll call my doctor this a.m. Still don't feel %100 now. But I must say that I slept the longest intervals last night.

My work environment is strange. I continue to work there with little and no comments like "how are you feeling?" from my area. There is one girl that does talk to me about the cancer. But others perhaps don't know what to say. I just would expect more since I do have more than just a common cold. I am thankful for a couple of my buddies at the job, and they know who they are.

I did make a call to the nurse at the Cancer Center on how I've been feeling. She told me to take a compazine pill/anti nausea. Also, said these are probably my crappy days. Have to go through a cycle to see what/how your body will react. That way you know for next cycles. The pill did the trick and the burping stopped. I just had very little energy at work, just kept yawning most of the time.

Came home once again to another wonderful meal of love. Thanks to Lisa, Kelly, Meg and Michelle for the recent meals. It is such a load off of my mind, you wouldn't believe it. Also, thanks to all my new blogger friends. You bring a smile to my face as I read your comments.

Go Bo! American Idol

Look good and feel even better.

Just wanted to say thanks to all my new "posters" of comments. Now I know you are out there reading my journal. Gives me more strength in knowing that.

After work I went to American Cancer Society Look Good Feel Better program. They give you about $130 free cosmetics, along with helpful hints about wigs/scarves. Met some more wonderful ladies. There was one woman there, her name is Karen. She volunteered to have her hair shaved as today it was coming out all over. What a gal. She was wearing such a beautiful hat, so color co-ordinated. I asked if she always wore hats, and she said no. Her hair was cut short like mine. She said that she didn't ask to be in this situation but was going to make the best of it! My kind of people.

If only I can remember how to put on the makeup by myself. I wish I could save my face as it is now. Really look nice in my opinion.

Friends are ....

Just look at my blog and comments and you will find the definition of friends. To think I can come home from working and have a meal waiting for me is to be a blessing. Thank you.

Our first meals of love were delivered today. What a treat. Can't tell you how much this gesture means to me/us. I am so thankful that we moved to God's country.

I did get some positive news from the drug company Emend. I have been approved for free pills for the anti-nausea. The pills I used for my first chemo cost over $330 since insurance didn't cover them. But thanks to the Cancer Center and Brenda, my social worker, Emend approved them for me. They will automatically send them to me a week before each treatment. And if needed, I have 1 year of supply. There certainly are angels on earth.

Work was extremely busy today. Didn't help that I had wicked headache. But the nurse at the Cancer Center did tell me that I could take percacet or the like for the pain. And of course, ativan for anxiety/stress. I did take these when I came home and I feel much better. A nice feeling of almost la la land. Will be a pleasure not to have a headache.

Tomorrow I go to Look Good Feel Better class at the Cancer Center. Looking forward to it.
I also have a check up with my surgeon, assuming that will be my last one.

Some aches

Didn't sleep well last night, even with sleeping pill. Tossed and turned. At 6 a.m., I took an alleve and attempted to go back to sleep. Flu like aches in my legs and a bad headache continue.
Since the headache wasn't getting any better, I took some sudafed because it could be sinus headache. I also found that when I put a hot face cloth on my eyes it felt so good. But of course, the heat doesn't last a long time.

At about 11:30, Barry suggested I get up and move to my chair in living room since it was such a nice day. So I did. Enjoyed a popsicle as I looked out the window. After a short while, Tim told me that I had a visitor in the back yard. Another deer! All by herself. Another sign from God that I needed to be up to see her. After she left the yard, Tim and I went into the woods and left some food for others to enjoy later. We also tossed out some old apples that we had.

Barry has gone to WalMart to look at new thermometers. It's very important that we watch for any fevers that we may get. Having a reliable thermometer is important. Tim has gone for a bike ride by himself. He usually bikes for about 9 or so miles. I've showered and my headache seems better. Will take more sudafed soon. Barry looks at me and hopes that he feels better than I do next week. I'm sure he will do fine.

Friends are so kind to us. They ask what they can do. I say continue to pray, but if you really want to know what would be like heaven it would just a simple meal. Even when I'm full of energy I don't like to think of meals. So now even a frozen meal sounds good to me. Last week I made a big batch of chicken soup so I could freeze a couple of containers for a "rainy" day.

I made myself get outside and walk to Lisa's house with Tim today. A bit tired but that's ok. That way I deserved my nap later on.

Symptoms I have noticed:
My sense of taste right now is gone. Nothing in my mouth tastes like anything. Am hoping this is short term because it certainly doesn't make you want to eat anything.
Headache has returned. Not as bad. Will check with doctor tomorrow to see if he can prescribe something.
Body aches no worse. Am noticing that even my teeth/jaw are sore.

Lisa P. telephoned me this evening. Friends had been asking her what they could do for us, and they've come up with making us some meals for the week. This week's meals for Monday, Wednesday and Friday are going to be taken care of by our friends. That is truly the definition of friendship, and I deeply appreciate the kindness. Had you ever asked me in the past about accepting help in this manner, I would have said there was no need. But have learned that accepting help is acceptable.

As I was doing the dishes tonight, I had a weepy time and Tim noticed. He came over and asked if I needed a hug. I told him that I certainly did need one, we're all going through so much right now. I try not to show tears in front of him but am only human. I told him that I was so lucky to have him, lucky that he's as grown up as he is. We talked about God giving us what we can handle, and we said that He will help us through these times. I have a very smart and caring son.

This picture was taken today after I walked to Lisa's house with Tim. I got myself motivated. 

This pill is called Emend and is used for anti-nausea. Cost me $110.00 and was worth every penney. Did not get sick. 

Day 3 following Chemo/ First effects of Neulasta

I have changed my blog name to reflect the recent news in my life.

Yesterday was an extremely busy day for any person, but for me since it was my 2nd day after chemo it was a lot more. But a day that a lot was accomplished.

Didn't sleep well last night. Up looking at the clock often. Woke up with another headache, which is a side effect of one of the chemo drugs. Took some tylenol along with my 3rd and last emend anti-nausea pill. Thank God that the anti-nausea pills do their job. Hard to explain what I am feeling today. As my bosom buddy Jody told me, you may feel like you're getting the flu with the bones aching. And that's how I am feeling. That is the neulasta doing it's job, building up bone marrow. It can last 3-5 days and will get stronger in pain. Just need to take alleve, motrin or tylenol. And I'm staying in my jammies today and attempting to rest for a change.

Due to my small body build, the doctor said I will feel the effects of that pill. Barry is possibly seeing first hand what he will be feeling next week.

That's it for now. Just had some soup and ready to lie down some more. A healing kind of a day for me. A well deserved day to be in bed.

Had a nice call this p.m. from "cousin" Tim. It was great to talk to him, and he also was able to talk with Barry. It sounded good just listening to Barry talk to his cousin. A lot more positive feelings than I've heard in past few weeks. You have to understand this, not knowing can be worse than knowing. After his call, I got out of my pj's and eventually went to the grocery store with Tim (son). We bought all the makings for banana splits. That's my latest downfall, something I've been enjoying this past week. Also picked up some pineapple, apples, strawberries and pears. Healthy food to munch on. It was pouring when we went to the store, and do you know what I did? I stood out in the rain and just enjoyed it hitting my face. Going through times like these make you appreciate the littlest things in life. Oh yes, Tim and I did buy what could be a winning lottery ticket at the store!! Will keep you posted if we do win.

When we pulled into the driveway from the grocery store, we were greeted by 3 deer in the back yard. Truly a sign from God. Deer have always been such a blessing to me, so they appeared at just the right time.

Another day is done. Did take some alleve for my body aches and head ache, and will be hitting the bed soon. Please, if you do take the time to read my journal, please post comments so that I do know that you are there reading it. It does give me additional inspiration just to read your comments. And thanks for adding us to your prayer chains.

WE ARE SURVIVORS! And now I will explain:

I have not posted anything to this blog all day, and it's for a very good reason.

At about 4:15 p.m. yesterday, I heard the results of Barry's liver biopsy from his doctor. He called me since Barry was at work and I was allowed to hear the results of the biopsy. Once again, in less than 2 months I heard the word CANCER. Once again, I was home alone as Tim was at a track meet. I don't know how God gives you the strength but He does. After he said the word cancer, he stopped for a moment and told me to take it in. I of course cried and didn't know what to do. Should I call him at his job since I already knew he was in a foul mood from not hearing results, should I drive to his job and tell him in person or wait until he comes home at midnite. The doctor told me that he was against me driving there as I just had my first chemo treatment and should not be driving so stressed. He explained that he was on call and that when Barry got home, he could call him for the news. I left it like that, I wouldn't tell him.
CT scan of brain/head along with bone scans will need to be done on Barry.

They type of cancer is adenocarcinoma. It is on the liver, but is NOT liver cancer. The origin is probably the lungs which also had spots showing on previous scan.

At 7:30 p.m. Barry called and asked if the doctor called me with results. I asked him if he wanted the truth if he was at work. He said yes, and I told him. Actually he took it quite well. Had wished I told him earlier since his boss had just left and many other employees were concerned about the results.

When he came home a few hours later, we hugged and knew the next day would yield a lot of questions. I then went to bed.

All the above happened yesterday.

Today:

Busy and productive day. By 8:30 a.m. the doctor had lined up all tests needed to be done. Time was for 10 a.m. We then went to see his boss to talk in person to. Went to lunch at Hickory Grill since we didn't make it there yesterday. Went to a 1 p.m. appt. with Dr. Garrow, OUR oncologist for consultation. I also had follow up appt. for my first chemo treatment along with the neulasta shot to build up white blood cells. Side effects will be achey bones which means the drug is working and building up bone marrow.

Barry's treatment will be the following and will start next THURSDAY:

He will go through 3 cycles of chemotherapy with an IV of Taxol and Carboplatin. It will take about 4 hrs. for each treatment. It has to go in slowly. It is a very potent drug combination.
Should not need anti nausea pills like I take for 3 days. Will go in next day for neulasta like I do.
After the 3 cyles, additional CT scans will be taken to see if tumor has shrunk. This will determine if treatment will be continued. He reiterated that he does not have liver cancer, cancer cells have settled on/near liver from other place. Most like lungs. We don't worry about the source as we will be fighting it with even more powerful drugs.

It's been a very long day for both of us. And of course, we had to tell Tim once again that terrible word. But you know. I think we will all make it. I know we will make it.

Barry's attitude has even changed. Past 3 weeks he appeared doomed, but with a diagnosis and treatment plan the unknown is now known. That makes all the difference.

Have told my family and close friends, and they don't know how I am getting through this. I have shed tears today but can't continue to cry. Negative energy and a son to be a role model to. And if you're not walking, you're not going anywhere. It's by the grace of God that I/We will make it.

Please continue to pray for us.

First Chemo Treatment today

It was on March 15th that Dr. Henwood said the word cancer to me. And here it is about 2 months later and I'm having my first chemo treatment. Time flies when you're having fun!
Appt. is at 10:30 a.m. and I'm not sure how long it will be. They have to put the chemo drugs in very slowly the first time.

First chemo is complete!!! 1/4 of the way done for chemo. Got there at 10:30 a.m. and got home at 1:30 p.m. There was a bit of a delay due to them not receiving the echocardiogram results yet. Kendra was my nurse. She was so nice like everyone that has come into my life lately. Once connected up with the IV she inserted a steroid along with about 15 minutes to administer the adriamycin (red coolaid) by syringe into the IV. This was then followed by 1/2 hour drip of the second drug that starts with a C. They usually go hand in hand. Adriamycin is a powerful anti-cancer drug.

After coming home I called my family to tell them the news. The one thing that tells me I have chemo drugs in me is that my urine is red due to the drug. Tomorrow I have to go back for follow-up and to get a shot of neulasta to boost my white blood cells. Science has really improved with these drugs.

Will probably hit my bed this p.m. for a nice nap just to rest my brain. At least now I know the process, it's not an unknown to me. The only unknown right now is what will the drugs do to me in the next couple of weeks. All in all, I feel great right now to have this in the past.

In looking back at the day right now, only thing I have is a headache but that could be stress related. Have taken tylenol and anxiety pill. Only was able to rest for short time.

Highlight of my day at 7:24 p.m. was seeing about 4 deer in back woods along with Tim's pet raccoon. A sign from God.

Love you all.

One more day

And I'll be on a new journey. I'm thinking of this as a second chance to re-create myself even better. Am off to work wearing a dress! Yes, a dress that only happens couple times each summer. Plus earrings instead of my usual studs. It's all about attitude.

Wish I had known what kind of a day it was going to be at work today. I would have called in sick myself. Someone else did call in sick for some reason, plus someone on vacation. So, just another sucky day at work. I've already vented to my close friends about the whole deal at work so I won't go back over the old wounds.

When Barry went to fill my presciption for anti-nausea pills to be taken the day of treatment, followed by the next two days (a total of 3 pills), he was told that insurance did not cover them.
$333.00 was the cost for these 3 pills, which I will need for the other 3 treatments. It's hard to believe nowadays that with so much cancer out there, insurance companies can charge this fee.
It just adds to the already stressed situation the cancer patient is in. But as Barry said, you need the pills so we have to just buy them. Am thankful that we had the money to even pay for them.

A tiring day but I have to look forward. Can't go backwards. Have already taken ativan for anxiety, and will take another one in a.m. along with one of my $100 pills. If I don't get sick I guess it is worth the money!

Until tomorrow....

A great day/New changes

Today I went to the Cancer Center and met with Brenda, a nurse oncologist. She explained the different drugs that I will be administered on Thursday. She also gave me prescriptions to fill and to use the day of treatment. Nausea pills. After our meeting, I finally got to see where the chemo is done. I think this was so beneficial since it was an unknown in my head, not knowing what to expect. It's a round shape room, with separate "suites" for individual treatments around 1/2 the room. Each room has a curtain if you want privacy, television, vcr, recliner chair for patient and another chair for a visitor. They have a fully stocked refrigerator with tons of fruit cups and soda, and of course lots of saltines. After meeting with Brenda, I went to the hospital for an echocardiogram. This will serve as a baseline for future purposes if needed.

After work, I picked up Lisa P. and we went to Images and looked at wigs. I jumped at the first wig which was just what I had on my mind. A bob-style cut and the color is like a frosted blonde. Really nice. Billie then cut my hair short like I used to wear it many years ago. At last I have short hair again!! Poor Barry.. My sister Eileen saw me on the webcam and says I look much younger now. This weekend I am going to have Tim take pictures of my hair cut and of me wearing my new wig.

I don't know if you can sense this by this writing, but I'm feeling pretty positive and comfortable about my situation. I know with the help of good meds and positive thinking that I will make it through what actually is a small portion of my life. And as my bosom buddy Jody said to me:
after this treatment I am 1/4 of the way done!

P.S. No news on Barry's liver biopsy. They did tell him that it should be ready by Wednesday.
So hopefully tomorrow we will hear from doctor. I did speak to the surgeon today so they know we are anxiously waiting for the results.

Another nice day.

Well, it looks like another nice day in Pennsylvania. But looks can be deceiving. Off to work soon. Nothing else to report now, just wanted to show that I'm awake and kickin' in Pa.

It was one of those days from you know what at work today. Definitely not one of the positive energy days that I am in need of for this week. System was down and the day just went down the tubes. Would like to say something positve came out of the hours at work today but I would be lying. And I'm no liar. Hoping tomorrow is better.

One of the best things about this week is that I'm only working 3 days.

Tomorrow is busy day for me. I have a chemo teaching class followed by an echocariogram at the hospital. Apparently the chemo drugs that you are given do a job on your heart. And then after work I am going to look at wigs and hopefully get my hair cut there. Lisa P. is coming with me, and I'm looking forward to it.